Just Because I’m Alone Doesn’t Mean I’m Lonely

Just Because I’m Alone Doesn’t Mean I’m Lonely ©iStock/freemixer

I haven’t found the right guy who fits perfectly with who I am, and that’s OK with me. I know from the outside looking in, it seems like being in my situation might be tough — I wake up alone, I complete my daily grind alone and I get into bed with no one to wish me goodnight — but believe it or not, my life is perfectly happy just as it is. Seriously, just because I’m alone doesn’t mean I’m lonely.

  1. My happiness is my choice. Having someone in my life isn’t something I see as the key to happiness. Being happy is a choice I make everyday for myself. I can choose to wallow in misery and self-pity because I don’t have a relationship, causing me to feel miserable and alone, or I can choose to look at my life in a positive way. I’ve chosen to feel happy with myself even if I don’t have love in my life.
  2. I’ve had the pity party already, and I’m over it. I’ve seen stages of loneliness that some people wouldn’t be able to live through longer than five minutes, and it’s made me amazingly strong and confident in myself. I’ve cried myself to sleep, I’ve bitched and moaned about not having someone around and I’ve risen past the pits of sadness to a point where I feel full and content with just myself.
  3. Single doesn’t automatically mean lonely. I’ve heard people in fully committed relationships complain about feeling alone all the time, even more so than I do. In fact, I think my single life has allowed me to conquer feelings of loneliness in a way not many can. I had only myself to rely on to kill the sadness — I didn’t depend on having someone else in my life to do it for me.
  4. The people in my life don’t make me feel lonely at all. I have some amazing people in my life who are always available for me if I ever start to feel like I’m hitting a rough patch emotionally. My friends and my family have become so much more than just casual bonds in my life — they’re the loves of my life. You don’t need to have a romantic relationship to kill feelings of loneliness, you just need great people in your life, and I’ve chosen mine wisely.
  5. I’m my own best friend. Being single for as long as I have, I’ve gotten to know myself so deeply, to a point that I truly love who I am. Even if I spend a lot of time alone, I’m spending that time on the best relationship I could ever have — the one with myself. There’s no room for loneliness when you’re always in good company.
  6. I’ve watered the grass on my side of the fence. I had a choice long ago to make my life as rewarding as it could be or to wallow in shame because of the lack of love in my life. I chose to water my own grass so that I didn’t look over the fence into the world of relationships and feel envious, or like I was missing out on something. I built and chased dreams for myself, I took on new hobbies and I paid attention to everything I had all along.
  7. Alone time is pretty fantastic. They say that if you can’t be happy alone, you’ll never be happy in a relationship, either. That’s pretty great news for me because I actually love my alone time. There are things I get to do in complete solitude that would drive most people in relationships insane. I don’t get bored on my own and I don’t feel like I’m wasting precious time when I’m nurturing the only relationship that I’m guaranteed to die with. It’s me against the world, and that’s all I need. Love would only be a huge bonus.
  8. I’m too busy living my life to notice or care. When people constantly assume the life I’m living must be lonely, it’s only because they likely wouldn’t be strong enough to brave it themselves. In all honesty, I’m too busy living and making this life amazing, with or without a relationship, to notice or care that I’m alone. I’m not lonely at all.
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