How To Keep Your Relationship As Low-Stress As Possible If You Have Anxiety

I’ve been with my partner for years and I know we’re solid, but I still have irrational fears sometimes—like that he’ll randomly leave me one day. However, I’ve learned some tricks along the way that have helped me relax more in my relationship—maybe they’ll help you too.

  1. Cuddle more. Touching and cuddling release oxytocin, a feel-good hormone that helps to reduce stress and anxiety, so it’s a great method to use to calm down together. It’ll also help you feel closer to your partner. Snuggling up after a long day at work, for instance, allows you to reconnect and decompress. If you’re one of those people that doesn’t like cuddling, there are other approaches too.
  2. Have more sex. There are exceptions to this because plenty of people are happy without sex. However, for lots of couples, being intimate helps reduce stress and anxiety. Like cuddling, it also releases oxytocin to make you feel good and even lowers your blood pressure, which will reduce stress. Sex is the ultimate way to reinforce your connection to your partner, and the more connected you feel, the more you’ll be at ease with each other and the less tense your relationship will be.
  3. Maintain separate interests and friends. If you’re dependent solely on your partner to make you happy, your relationship will be strained and you may fight a lot. By maintaining your own lives, you’ll be more fulfilled in general, which will make you more relaxed with your partner. Also, you won’t get sick of each other and will appreciate your time together even more.
  4. Talk more. Make sure you keep the line of communication open with your partner at all times. Talking about anything and everything will help ensure you’re both on the same page. It’ll help you relax a little because you’ll always know what’s on your significant other’s mind. It’s easy to become lazy and to forget to talk about things, but putting in that effort will minimize strain in your relationship.
  5. Don’t wait to talk about something if it’s bothering you. Talking more also means talking about things that may not be easy. If your partner does something that bothers you, don’t wait to talk about it because you don’t want to start an argument. If you don’t let it out, it’ll just keep bottling up until it explodes and then the problem is even worse. Talking about problems right when they arise will make your relationship more carefree.
  6. Have designated date nights. Make sure to set aside time to go out on regular date nights and do something together that you both enjoy and can bond over. When you’re out having fun together, don’t talk about the stressors in your relationship. Having good times together will help you to remember why you’re with that person in the first place, and the more you work to keep that connection strong, the less stressful your relationship will be.
  7. Let the little things go. Try not to let little annoyances in your relationship cause unnecessary conflict. It’ll only make your relationship tenser because you’ll be fighting over every little thing. If there’s a big problem like cheating, for example, then you should obviously talk about it. If it’s something silly like one of you doesn’t take the trash out right away, then it’s really not worth bickering over. Picking your battles will go a long way toward achieving a low-stress partnership.
  8. Always give each other the benefit of the doubt. Don’t automatically think the worst of what the other person says or does. If you trust your partner, you don’t need to doubt them constantly. If you make a habit of believing that your significant other means the best and probably isn’t doing anything wrong, you will be much more relaxed. If you’re always looking for the positives in one another, your relationship will be easier.
  9. Show that you love one another. You need to show your love to your partner, even if it’s in small ways, and they need to do the same in return. It can be as simple as making dinner together or watching your favorite TV show together. You should be telling them that you care too, but your actions will mean even more. If you’re constantly giving and getting that reassurance, you won’t be as anxious about where you stand as a couple because you’ll already know.
  10. Realize that your anxiousness is probably all in your head. The reason you’re so uptight in your relationship may be because you need to work on yourself and your confidence. Be aware that you might be worried when there’s no need to be. Even if things do get rocky, you should understand that relationships aren’t always easy, and sometimes relationships can’t be saved no matter what you do. Accept that possibility, and just focus on enjoying the good times. It took me a long time to learn these things, but once I did, my relationship became a lot less stressful.
Kelli loves to write about lots of different topics, especially relationships, parenting, health, and fitness. She is excited to share her experiences!