If you’ve been on the internet, especially on social media platforms like Tumblr or Tik Tok you might have heard of the Kink Test before. This checklist goes around the internet fairly often, and the main one most people take was created a few years ago. It’s a questionnaire that evaluates how kinky you are according to common BDSM practices. But, while the most popular version is called the BDSM test, there are other similar options out there. Here is what you need to know about the test and how you can learn about your love life from it.
- Take it with a grain of salt. Before getting into anything else, remember that a kink test is mostly just for fun. Just like most personality tests on the internet, it might help you evaluate things about yourself or others in your life, but it’s not based on scientific facts. If you don’t like your results or don’t enjoy the test, don’t feel like you have to take it or make any life changes based on your results.
- Remember, there’s nothing wrong with “vanilla” sex. There are often pressures for people, especially women, to perform more hardcore acts in the bedroom to please their partners. If you don’t like most BDSM or other more “out there” kinks, there’s nothing wrong with that. It’s totally great to explore this side of yourself and embrace it, but if it doesn’t work for you, that’s cool too.
- Kink is consensual. There are many discussions to be had about which kinks are acceptable and which are not. But, while fantasies are one thing, kinks aren’t an excuse to harm another person or violate consent. So, as you take the test, remember that BDSM communities believe in practicing consent and in negotiating what happens beforehand.
- There are many kinds of kinks. BDSM (Bondage and Discipline, Dominance and Submission, Sadism and Masochism) is often what people think about when they think about kink. However, there are lots of other kinks out there. Some people are really into feet, for instance. It isn’t easy to define because what seems kinky and non-conventional to one person might not seem that way to others.
- The kink test can help you explore new fantasies. A kink test may bring up questions and ideas you’ve never even thought of before. It’s an excellent way to get some exposure to different acts without having to look up more explicit material online. So, you may enjoy the exploratory nature of these tests, and they can help you self-reflect on what you desire sexually.
More things to know about taking a kink test
- You can get some suggestions about if you’re a dom or a sub. Many people are on a spectrum when it comes to what they enjoy sexually, while others prefer to be in charge or to be more submissive. If you’ve never expressed any of these sides or feel like you have been put in one box because of your gender or socialization, a kink test may open your mind to ideas of control and submission. It’s fun to try things out!
- You can take it with partners. Taking a kink test if you’re single is great, but so is taking it if you’re with someone. There are even some tests out there that allow you and your partner to take the tests separately and it then sends you the results you have in common. In other words, you’ll only see the acts you’re both interested in. This is a low-stress way to find some common fantasies you both share but might not have felt comfortable bringing up on your own.
- Taking a kink test (and knowing the results) can help you feel more confident. Many people grew up with ideas about sexuality and sex that were more traditional. If you feel like you couldn’t learn much about yourself and your desires because of this, something as simple as using a checklist online could help you feel more confident in your sex life.
- A kink test is just the beginning. These questions could inspire you to explore sides of your sexuality with yourself or with others. However, one test probably won’t change everything. It’s just the beginning of looking into new ways of having sex or creating fantasies. So, you can take what you’ve learned about yourself and have a lot of fun with things.
- Some things might disturb you. Before you take a quiz online, you need to be prepared. Be aware that it might bring up something you’re not into or even find a bit weird or gross. There will probably be questions and acts you would never do. Some things might make you feel very turned off. So, before you go searching online to learn more about your more kinky sex, make sure you feel comfortable exploring. If you don’t, that’s great. But, if you feel like having some sexy fun, go ahead! You are the person who knows your own limits best.
- Just have fun! Kink tests aren’t supposed to be super serious. Don’t stress! Just have fun exploring what makes you tick and feel sexy.