I Knew I Was His Rebound, But This Is Why I Don’t Feel Used

Some people might think that I was foolish to get into a relationship that I knew wasn’t to go beyond the bedroom with a guy who’d only just gotten out of a relationship, but I don’t regret my decision at all. I entered our hookup fully aware that there was no real future and I don’t feel used.

  1. I wasn’t looking for something serious to begin with. I wasn’t blind, for God’s sake — I knew that I was a rebound and I was totally okay with that. It would have been a whole other issue if I thought that I was going to coerce him into changing his mind on another long-term relationship right after he got out of one. We’ve all been there. I just took the opportunity to strike while the iron was hot.
  2. I came into the relationship with completely open eyes. I knew what I was going to get out of this relationship, just as I knew what was going to be put into it by both of us. I wasn’t caught off-guard by the direction of this relationship because I knew off the bat what I was getting myself into. If every relationship could start with both parties knowing what they’re in store for, things would so much more transparent and that much easier, for better or worse.
  3. It was fun while it lasted. Was I supposed to sit around with bated breath, waiting for the end because I was a rebound hookup? Hell no. I enjoyed every bit of this ride — both figuratively and literally — and I wouldn’t have changed it a bit. We had fun, and we were able to have that fun with no future implications implied. Fun is fun ’til it’s not anymore, and when both parties are in agreement that things just aren’t going to be that serious, all you can do is sit back and enjoy the view.
  4. Things don’t need to be serious to be impactful. He was awesome and his ex-girlfriend could probably attest to that unless she’s a jerk. It’s a great experience having someone of quality in your life, even if it’s just for a fleeting moment in the grand scheme of things. People are complex creatures and watching them in action often results in the best kind of life experience.
  5. Unexpected lessons were learned. Like, for example, I learned that I can have fun with someone and enjoy their company without worrying about what’s to come or where the relationship was headed. Though it might not have appeared that way to others, this hookup did loads for my self-esteem and independence. It was an all-around good time and while we were together, he made me feel good about myself. The next girl he’s in a long-term relationship is in for a great ride herself, and I’m cheering her on.
  6. My confidence actually got a boost because of this relationship. I knew he wasn’t looking for anything serious and he was transparent about it from the get-go. That made me realize that he respected me enough to tell me that this was going to be short-lived, and I didn’t walk into this — or out of it — feeling like crap. The mutual respect between us did wonders for my confidence, and if anyone on the outside sees it differently, they can have all that. What matters is I know how I felt in this mini-relationship, and it was good for me.
  7. Like a great one-night stand, it was exciting as hell. Things stayed totally fresh because both of us knew that it wasn’t going to last long enough to become stale. Not taking the chance is like refusing an apple because it would eventually just be a core. Eat the apple while you have it and enjoy it, right? Neither of us needed to bellyache and agonize over where this was going because we both knew full-well that the excitement wouldn’t end until the relationship was over.
  8. The not-knowing made things that much better. We didn’t know where things were going to go, aside from knowing that it wasn’t going to be long-term. It’s funny how you sometimes appreciate things that are fleeting more than you do those fully grounded into your life and being. The not-knowing was invigorating and it made me feel alive.
  9. I didn’t walk away with any regrets whatsoever. Why even would I? I absolutely knew what I signed up for and so did he. The only regret I would have had is if I didn’t take the opportunity to get to know him, hook up with him and have a grand old time watching things unfold.
  10. I look back on our time as a bright spot in my life. We had a fantastic time and it was probably because we knew that, like a shooting star, it could only last so long before burning out. We went out with a bang, baby, and all I can do in retrospect is look back on the whirlwind romance and smile, because whew… what a ride.