I Know I Should Go For Nice Guys But I’m Just Not Attracted To Them

Dating “nice guys” is great in theory. They’re reliable, comforting, and complete gentlemen. A nice guy means a nice relationship, and hopefully, a nice and happy life, right? Not really. For whatever reason, I get annoyed by their romantic gestures and freaked out by their over-attentiveness. Basically, they’re kind of the worst.

  1. I Second Guess Their Actions. Nice guys show you and tell you when they like you. I’m not accustomed to that behavior, which makes me second guess everything they say. Like, why do these dudes care so much about me? They don’t really know me that well and yet they’re always making time for me and kissing my ass. They must want something, right? Or, maybe they’re serial killers!
  2. I Can’t Deal With Passive Aggressiveness. Nice guys don’t always have the guts to express their feelings, especially when they’re upset about something. Instead of saying why they’re mad or angry, they’ll typically just say nothing and pout instead. I don’t have the time or the will to pick up on their silent treatment and then guess what they’re upset about. No thanks!
  3. I Don’t Want Guys Blowing Up My Phone. I need my space—maybe that’s why I usually date guys who are a little detached and have no problem giving it to me. In my experience, nice guys aren’t exactly space givers. When they like someone, they really like that person and they text A LOT. I don’t want guys texting me all day, every day. In fact, I don’t want ANYONE texting me all day, every day.
  4. I Prefer Sex That’s Good. Okay, so I’m not saying all nice guys are bad in bed, but this goes with the whole passive aggressive thing. I want someone who I can get freaky with, ya know? That means both of us expressing our sexual fantasies and then doing our best to execute them in the bedroom. Nice guys aren’t going to tell me what their wildest sex dreams are, at least not without giggling.
  5. I’m Annoyed By People Who Are Overly Sweet. Is it just me or do overly sweet people drive you crazy too? I’m a pretty outspoken and sometimes crude individual and I don’t usually get along with super nice people. If they’re not dropping the F-bomb every other sentence and/or constantly saying what’s on their mind, I can’t hang with them.
  6. I Want Someone Who Can Be Upfront. I don’t want a guy who’s always hurting my feelings, but I want someone who isn’t afraid to tell me like it is. If I’m being a bitch, I want him to tell me that (maybe not in that exact way) but you get my drift. Nice guys aren’t usually very good at calling girls out.
  7. I’m Not A Fan Of Big Romantic Gestures. As crazy as this might sound, I don’t like huge, over-the-top romantic gestures—you know, the kind of stuff nice guys do all the time on TV. That crap kind of freaks me out. Maybe I’m emotionally messed up, but I don’t want to be serenaded in a crowded restaurant. I don’t want someone to shout their love for me from the top of the Empire State Building. Ugh, that sounds like a nightmare.
  8. I Want To Date A Protector. In my experience, nice guys are just that—nice guys. They might be handsome, athletic, or charming, but something about them lacks a certain je ne sais quoi. They wouldn’t punch someone in the face for talking crap about me. They might want to, but they’d probably end up walking away because “fighting is never the answer.” Lame!
  9. I Don’t Want To Date A Doormat. Nice guys can be huge pushovers. As much as I like the idea of being in charge in a relationship, I don’t want to always be calling the shots. I want someone who can make his own decisions without “running them by me first.” If he wants to eat Chinese food, I want him to say that instead of eating Italian simply because I suggested it.
  10. I Kind Of Like Games. It’s not that I want someone who ignores me and treats me like crap, but I do want someone who knows how to play the relationship game. I’m just being honest here—dating someone who does whatever you say is boring and frankly nauseating. Still, just because I don’t want a nice guy doesn’t mean I want a douchebag. Something in between the two extremes would be nice.
Jordan White is a writer based in Scottsdale, Arizona with more than 8 years of experience. She graduated from Northern Arizona University with a degree in Rhetoric and Creative Writing in 2015 and while there, she wrote for The Daily Wildcat. She has since written for sites including FanBread, and, of course, Bolde. You can find about more her on Facebook. She has a passion for giving her audience something to laugh about and despises the heat more than anything.