I Know My Worth & I Won’t Date A Guy Who Doesn’t

It took me a long time to build up my self-confidence and self-worth and now that I have, I’m determined to get the very best out of life and love. I know what I deserve and I won’t date a guy who doesn’t recognize that or who isn’t willing to give it to me — here’s why:

  1. He’ll never treat me right. If he doesn’t know my worth, how will he ever be able to treat me the way I deserve? If he’s not willing to give me everything I want, what WILL he give me? I want a man who thinks I’m worth going the extra mile for; a man who’s going to treat me with love, respect, and kindness.
  2. I won’t be confident in his love for me. Why? Because he’s not confident in it either. He obviously doesn’t know my worth, so what exactly does he think of me? If he loved me, he would know I’m priceless, but not knowing my worth puts a price on my head. No matter what, I’ll always think that there’s something he believes I’m worth giving up for.
  3. He won’t know how to appreciate me. A man who doesn’t know my worth is a man who’s going to take me for granted. I want a man who feels so lucky to have found me, not a man who thinks I’m just okay or good enough until something better comes along. I’m not interested in wasting my time on a man who will never truly be grateful to have me in his life, even if I feel lucky to be in his.
  4. I’ll always feel like he thinks he’s settling. If he doesn’t see me as a total prize then why would he be with me? I’m obviously not the girl of his dreams, so what am I? I’m the girl he settles for just so he doesn’t have to be single. Unless a man sees my worth, then being together just means we’re both settling for less than we deserve — and we both deserve better.
  5. He won’t make an effort. I’m not going to pick up the slack for a guy who just couldn’t be bothered. If he doesn’t see my worth then he’ll never work to have a solid and healthy relationship with me. He’ll be a passive partner in this relationship, which means he’ll never be boyfriend material to me.
  6. I want a man who sees the best in me. I want a man who knows me better than myself and likes every part of me — even my flaws. I don’t want a man who only sees my imperfections or who would ever think of me as “not good enough.” If a man can’t see my worth, then he’s just not worthy of me.
  7. I don’t want our relationship to be unequal. If I recognize and appreciate his worth but he doesn’t see mine, then how is our relationship ever going to work? He’ll always think that he’s better than me. I don’t want to try to catch up to a man who feels I’m beneath him. I want to be equal partners and I can only have that with a man who thinks I’m deserving of his love.
  8. He’ll never love me for who I am. I’ll never be enough for him. He’ll always want more than I can give. A man who doesn’t know my worth sees me as a work in progress, not a finished piece. I’m no man’s art project. I shouldn’t have to change myself just to be with someone else. That’s why I need a man who loves me for me.
  9. I want a man who thinks I’m worthy of his love. I don’t want to be with a guy who thinks he’s doing me a favor by dating someone below his league. If he thinks he’s too good for me, then the truth is I’m too good for him. I’m too good to be with a guy who’s so narcissistic that he can’t see the good in me because he’s too busy being in love with himself.
  10. I love myself. That’s why I want to be with a man who loves me too. I know my own worth and that’s why I’m not going to settle for a man who gives me less than I deserve. I don’t want a man who doesn’t see that I’m a catch. I’m confident in myself and that’s why I need a man who’s confident in me. I love myself way too much to ever date a man who sees me as unworthy.
Kelsey Dykstra is a freelance writer based in Huntington Beach, CA. She has a bachelor’s degree in Creative Writing from Grand Valley State University and been writing professionally since graduating in 2013. In addition to writing about love and relationships for Bolde and lifestyle topics for Love to Know, she also writes about payment security and small business solutions for PaymentCloud.

Originally from Michigan, this warm weather seeker relocated to the OC just last summer. Kelsey enjoys writing her own fictional pieces, reading a variety of young adult novels, binging on Netflix, and of course soaking up the sun.

You can find more about Kelsey on her LinkedIn profile or on Twitter @dykstrakelsey.