Ladies, Here’s Why It’s So Important To Be With A Guy Who Challenges You

You see it time and time again: couples who are with each other just for the sake of being with each other—”yes” couples who never argue, who’ve been together a long time and appear to be with each other because it’s comfortable and who’ve lost the spark in their relationship. The problem? They just don’t challenge each other.

  1. What’s life without a little excitement? If your boyfriend can’t provide you with at least a bit of a thrill then you might as well tell him to GTFO. Instead of plodding along with someone samey, in the same old routine, find someone who makes you feel truly alive. For me, if you don’t feel alive in your relationship, then it sounds like your relationship is dead. #SorryNotSorry
  2. Your relationship is never boring. If you and your guy challenge each other, your relationship will automatically be more exciting. You can never say your relationship is the “same old, same old” because it’ll be anything but dull. If you challenge each other, you’ll get under each other’s skins and disagree a lot. And you know what they say—opposites attract.
  3. It just shows that you’re passionate about each other. It makes life a hell of a lot more interesting if you’re with someone who lights a fire within you. I’m not talking about someone who makes you fiery and argumentative, but having someone who you feel passionate about is the key to any successful relationship. If your guy is happy to go along with what you want to do and your opinions all the live-long day, life is bound to be a total snoozefest. I don’t know about you, but I’m aiming for that extraordinary life.
  4. It makes the sex better. If you challenge each other, the passion that you have for each other outside of the bedroom will also be present inside the bedroom. And you know what that means, right? Better sexual chemistry and hotter sex in general. Oof. Yes, please.
  5. It means that you’ve met your match. If your boyfriend challenges you, he’ll call you out on all your crap just as you will for him. Your unchallenging ex might have let it slide that you constantly took the piss out of how he looks like a bald chicken after a trip to the barbers, but your current guy won’t stand for that crap. Sure, you’ll argue more than you would with someone who doesn’t challenge you, but it makes you stronger as a couple.
  6. Disagreeing is healthy. No two human beings are the same. We all have different minds and different ways of seeing things, therefore we’re supposed to disagree to an extent. It’s all about how you handle the situation when you do disagree with your man. Disagreeing occasionally is totally normal; however, disagreeing all the time is what I’d call a toxic relationship. Those never end well.
  7. It means that you’re not settling. If you’re with a guy who’s a bit of a challenge, then you’re not settling for a bland relationship. As I mentioned earlier, a lot of people end up sticking in the same relationship because they’re too scared or too comfortable to get out, even though they know that they’re not very compatible with the person. This means that down the line, they feel like their relationship is missing something. Not ideal.
  8. You’ll never need to look for passion elsewhere. When you’re in a fiery relationship with a hot sex life, there’ll be no need to look for passion elsewhere. Unlike an unchallenging relationship, where someone usually ends up cheating eventually, because they’re bored AF or their relationship is lacking in excitement.
  9. You’ll complement each other. Your strengths will offset his weaknesses if he positively challenges you, and vice versa. You might have different likes and dislikes, and different ways of doing things, but you will round each other out. Cue Madonna—he’ll hold the lock and you’ll hold the key. And that’s how you know that you’re in a win-win situation.
  10. He’ll make you a better person. Sure, it sounds cheesy, but he’ll make you a better version of yourself and help you to grow because he challenges you. And who couldn’t use a bit of personal growth? I don’t know about you, but challenge accepted!
Katie Davies is a British freelance writer who has built a career creating lifestyle content that caters to the modern woman. When she's not sipping tea, shopping, or exploring a new city, you'll probably find her blogging about her fashion and travel adventures at