What I Learned From Running Away From Love

Admittedly, I was terrified of love after my breakup from my lunatic ex. If that’s what love was all about, then I wanted no part of it ever again. When I met my current boyfriend, he knew he wanted to be with me no matter how hard I ran away from him — and I definitely ran. Eventually I settled down, but here’s what I learned in trying to escape love:

  1. Running from love will only leave you sad and alone. You may feel accomplished and exhausted, but it doesn’t really get you anywhere. You see the same things for miles and never change up your perspective. Plus, it gets really old really quickly.
  2. It’s unfair to the guy you’re running from. I’ll never really understand why he waited and fought to make me whole again, but I learned that no matter his reasons, I should have stopped being so selfish and afraid and worked with him and not against him.
  3. It can be good for you in small doses. Running from love forever is a terrible plan, but pushing away from it for a little while can help you find yourself and figure out what you’re so afraid of in the first place.
  4. It doesn’t mean you’re unlovable. Just because you don’t want to admit it or confront it doesn’t mean someone doesn’t love you. All love isn’t created equal or we’d all end up with the first person we dated. Trust me when I say you can and will be loved.
  5. Running from problems really doesn’t solve anything. I know we all know this, but it’s different when you learn it for yourself. Running doesn’t help.
  6. Eventually you run out of steam. Running constantly is exhausting, and eventually you just can’t do it anymore. If you’ve been running for a long time, you may have a long way back to the place you were before. Take the scenic route, figure yourself out, and don’t look back.
  7. Love will be always be waiting. I can’t promise that the guy will, though. I think I got lucky with my situation, but I know that even he has a breaking point, and if I had run much further, he may not have waited. However, love would have been there with someone eventually, no matter how long it took me.
  8. You may forget what you’re running from in the first place. If you run long enough, sometimes you forget what it is you’re running from and continue only out of habit, or because you’re afraid what might happen when you stop.
  9. It’s all a circle anyway, so you’re wasting your time. Realistically, you are running in a gigantic circle that will always bring you right back to where you started, so it’s better just to address what you’re afraid of, not let it own your life, and get out there. You’re worth the effort in yourself!
C. is an aspiring yogi and Ph.D student who loves her dogs, bright lipstick and to travel. Find her on IG @drparko121314