Life Is Too Short To Pine Over Men Who Ran Away

Unfortunately, it’s a fact of life—most men aren’t going to stick around, especially if you’re a strong and independent woman. They can’t handle it so they dip. Good riddance! Here’s why you shouldn’t waste your time crying over these dudes—they’re really doing you a favor.

  1. They weren’t strong enough for you. It’s better to know early on that a dude can’t hang. It sucks to find out, but you don’t want to find out later when the crap really hits the fan. What if something catastrophic happened and they left then? If they can’t even deal in the very beginning, they definitely won’t be able to later. Good riddance.
  2. They misled you. These guys are masters of behaving like they’re sincere and genuine in the very beginning. They act like you’re the most amazing woman they’ve ever met and talk a great game. They treat you like a dream come true… until the reality of being in a relationship sets in and they decide they can’t commit. Life is way too short to be sad over these jerks.
  3. They weren’t emotionally mature. This is the big kicker—even if they acted like they were, their behavior proves otherwise. It’s easy to beat yourself up for not seeing it, but it’s not your fault. They should’ve been better humans and never taken you down that road. It’s them, it’s not you.
  4. They fooled themselves. Sometimes they even truly mean well—they aren’t all total douche bags. They liked you and they fooled themselves into thinking that somehow they could make it work. They might’ve even thought they could be different this time around—but if they haven’t done any internal work, they aren’t going to be able to have a mature relationship.
  5. They were too little man for you. You’re a modern woman and you require a lot from a man. He has to be emotionally available and sensitive but still able to stand up for himself and for you. You’re beautifully complex and you need someone who understands and appreciates it. Most men simply won’t, so you have to move on and keep looking forward.
  6. They would’ve stayed if they really cared. A man who wants to be with you will be with you. It’s that simple. Don’t overthink it or make excuses for the guys who bowed out. They obviously weren’t right for you, so you can stop thinking about them now and wishing things were different.
  7. They’re selfish. A truly evolved woman cannot tolerate a selfish, immature man for very long. He might seem fun at first, but the glow won’t last. You would’ve gotten fed up with his emotionally stunted ways soon enough. The only reason you’re sad is because he ghosted you before you saw them.
  8. They couldn’t handle the idea of feeling real feelings. It’s sad but true—a lot of men are terribly afraid of being vulnerable and emotionally open. It’s scary but you can’t be with a guy who isn’t willing to go there. It’s not worth the time and effort spent. If he’s scared of the idea of falling in love with you, you’re better off alone.
  9. They couldn’t handle your honesty. You’re ready for something authentic and deep. You live in a raw, honest, real way. You understand that life is too precious to do anything else. Unfortunately, a lot of people live in fear of being themselves. If he ran away because you’re “too much” for him, he’s a fool and you don’t really want him.
  10. They would’ve always failed you during tough times. It’s the truth. No matter how much you wish that things were different, the very fact that they ghosted tells you everything you need to know about them. You don’t want to spend your life with a man who runs at the idea of a bump in the road. Keep that in mind and keep your head high.
  11. They were all talk. Sure, they said pretty things to you and made you feel good, but how did their actions make you feel? Take a good look and you might have to admit that something was lacking. It usually is with guys like this. Remind yourself what you deserve and dry your eyes.
  12. You’re free now to seek the right man. Look on the bright side! You could’ve stayed with him longer and missed out on a better dude. You would’ve been more invested and more heartbroken when it ended. Now you are free to do whatever you like and available for the guy who truly deserves you. That’s wonderful.
  13. They’re no longer wasting your precious time. That’s right—any more time with him would’ve been pointless. You could’ve had more fun and made more memories, but the end result would’ve been the same. It’s best that it happens as soon as possible so you know the deal. It’s a gift, not a sad event.
  14. You have a beautiful, unique life to live. You need to commit yourself to living your best life with or without a man. Frankly, you’re better off without one if he’s just going to run away. You deserve better and you know it. Yes, it sucks because you let yourself care and get attached, but you’re strong and you’ll move on and find someone better suited to you. You just have to have faith and enjoy life regardless.
  15. You are too precious and amazing to let fools dull your shine. It’s the truth. You can and will find a man who knows what a treasure you are. Then you will look back on all the others and understand why it didn’t work out. These painful experiences are there as a learning process so that you will know it when the right guy comes into your life.
A former actress who has always loved the art of the written word, Amy is excited to be here sharing her stories! She just completed her first novel, and is also a contributor for Elite Daily, Dirty & Thirty, and Thought Catalog. Amy is the founder of What If Journey and can be found on Twitter @amyhorton18. You can also visit her website at amyhorton.net.