What It’s Like Entering The Dating World For The First Time At 25

When you’re with your first and only boyfriend from the age of 18 to 25, you’re basically a dating virgin when he leaves you for your best friend four months before your wedding (yes, this really happened). It takes a while to get over it, but eventually you realize you’re ready to move on and want to get back out there. The only problem? Entering the dating world for the first time at 25 is brutal. Here’s what it’s been like:

Degrading.

Let’s be real: men in their late 20s and 30s should really be way above the crap they’re pulling these days. Sending penis pics, asking for your bra size, and generally treating me like crap are actions that are not only commonplace, but truly depressing.

Liberating. 

When you’ve only been with one guy and you haven’t been single in a million years, you forget how much fun single can be. It is truly liberating to be able to have male friends again, too. Without the ball and chain attached to me, I can be me, do me, and just have an awesome time.

Exciting. 

Meeting new guys and going on dates can be really exciting and lead to a really good time. When you’ve never really done this before, it’s exhilarating. Getting dressed up to go to dinner or a movie is something I haven’t done in a long time and I’m loving it.

Nerve-racking.

Does he like me? Doesn’t he? Will he call? Why is this dating website so difficult to navigate? For women who’ve gone through this before, it’s probably not anxiety-inducing, but being a dating virgin changes everything. I literally cannot even right now with Tinder and I don’t understand why men keep sending me pictures of their junk!

Annoying. 

It isn’t fun to explain being left at the altar, and some dudes kind of freak out about it. It’s super annoying to deal with the judgment. It’s also annoying to go on lots of empty dates because guys aren’t upfront and honest about not wanting the same things.

Confusing. 

If you’re on a dating website, then the assumption is you want to date, right?! Clearly match.com should be renamed NetflixandChill.com. No one tells the truth and I don’t get it. If you want to hook up, can you just say that, please?

Complicated. 

Does anyone even know what they want anymore? I feel like the “it’s complicated” choice on Facebook applies to every relationship these days. People are fickle and change their minds about everything all the time, and no one seems to know what they want.

Detached. 

Ghosting and conducting basically an entire relationship via text and social media has made the dating process really impersonal and detached. Do people even really know one another anymore? How can you just stop talking to someone one day and be OK that’s how you “ended” it. Ever heard of closure?

Unfair. 

Missing out on college dating days and those “formidable” times has really put me at a disadvantage. I just don’t play the game well, and I think guys definitely have the upper hand.

Educating. 

I have learned so much about men, and since I don’t really have any previous experiences to compare it to, I also don’t have any long-term biases. Right now, men just totally suck.

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