If You Like A Guy, Don’t Wait For Him To Ask You Out — Go After Him

If You Like A Guy, Don’t Wait For Him To Ask You Out — Go After Him ©iStock/AleksandarGeorgiev

Making the first move is scary — and maybe that’s why we assume the guy should do it. But talking to someone first or taking the initiative to approach that cute guy will really get you far in the dating game. Plus, it’ll make you feel pretty incredible about your own capabilities. Here are a few reasons why all women should consider giving it a shot:

  1. It’s a great first impression. Most guys like girls who know what they want. Waiting around for him to talk to you will only make you seem a little insecure. Going up and taking your chances with someone takes a lot of guts — trust me, the guy you’re about to talk to knows how tough it is, and he’ll think it’s awesome that you have the ovaries to do it.
  2. It’ll boost your self-esteem. The more you do something, the better you get at it. So even if you approach a guy and it ends up being a fail, you’ve practiced your technique and know how to refine it for next time. (Plus, if that guy actually made you feel bad about making a move, he was probably a huge jerk anyway.)
  3. Being the person to ask the questions gives you more control over the situation. How many times have you waited around for some guy to make things official? Stop feeling sorry for yourself, and call him. You’re a hot commodity, and if the guy you’re dating doesn’t want to take things to the next level, he’s wasting your time by staying quiet about it.
  4. It’ll answer all of your questions. No need to try to submit something to Yahoo! Answers — you’ll find out once and for all if he likes you. Just imagine all of the time you’ll save by not questioning his every move. While it’s fun to gossip about the intentions of a crush, sometimes the whole process can truly drag. The truth of the matter is your girlfriends can’t tell you if this guy likes your company — only he can. So cut to the chase and ask him.
  5. It shows you’re successful. Successful women are self-starters — they don’t wait around for someone else to call the shots. If you’ve got the guts to approach a guy on a Friday night, surely you’ve got the guts to ask your boss about that well-deserved promotion next Monday.
  6. It’s step one of incredible communication. If you have the guts to make the first move, you’re already about five steps ahead of everyone else’s starter relationship. One of the biggest hurdles of dating is a lack of communication. By putting it all out there and taking a chance, you’re proving that you’re pretty much an open book.
  7. Yes, you have it in you. Stop doubting yourself all the time. There’s nothing in this world you can’t do. And being the person that asks someone else out first isn’t as daunting as you keep telling yourself. Sometimes dating can be scary, but taking charge will make you realize that it’s not as unbearable as you often assume.
  8. Your friends will totally be impressed. Sometimes you find the best motivation within the company you keep. If you prove that you can stand up and take charge, you might just inspire someone else you know and love. Don’t you want your bestie to have more self-confidence? Help her by paving the way.
  9. It’s scary for guys too. We often assume that guys are naturally trained to ask out women, but that’s not true. They feel pressured to make the first move because of outdated gender roles, but that doesn’t mean they love doing it. Hell, it also doesn’t mean they’re good at it. Why not save the guy some pressure and anguish by taking that first step?
  10. Who knows how many opportunities you might miss if you don’t? There’s a chance a guy is too scared to ask you out. Here you are, totally afraid that you’ll be single forever, while there’s a guy who’s simply too nervous to change things around. The only way you’ll know for sure if something will or won’t work out is if you take matters into your own hands.
Karen Belz is a New Jersey native who is currently living in Maryland. She has a Bachelor’s Degree in Speech Communication with a focus in Broadcasting and Print Media Studies from Millersville University of Pennsylvania. Since graduating, she has written for sites like LittleThings, HelloGiggles, and Scary Mommy and is currently an e-commerce editor at Bustle.

When she's not writing, she enjoys making her phone run out of memory after taking too many photos of her dog. You can find her on Twitter @karenebelz or on Instagram @karenbelz.