You Like Someone But They Don’t Feel The Same — What Now?

It’s really hard to have feelings for someone who doesn’t feel the same way. If you were brave enough to talk to them about it, you should give yourself a lot of credit. Even the most confident people have a hard time saying “I like you” when you’re not sure what the response back will be. Here are ways to get over the rejection and move forward.

Don’t think about it too much.

The more you think about the moment you revealed your crush, the worst it will seem. The “no thanks” will be amplified, and you’ll wonder whether or not they’re quietly making fun of you for admitting your feelings. There’s a great chance that everything was fine — you just need to put it past you and stop overthinking. Plus, if you actually like someone with the audacity to mock you for being open, they would have been a lousy partner anyway.

Try to focus on the negative.

Don’t be too negative since your crush is probably still a good person, but just for now, focus on the reasons why you wouldn’t be compatible. Maybe they often make bad jokes or is not great with texting back. Or, maybe they just seem incapable of holding a long-lasting relationship. Sure, your crush is ending since they’re not into you, but since they’re not into you, you’re not compatible. Find the other reasons why.

Don’t make them the villain.

People have a right not to like you. There’s a great chance that you also had to turn someone down once, and it’s not easy. Unless your crush laughed in your face, it was probably hard for them too. Treat them like a person. Understand where they’re coming from and realize it’s not the end of the world.

Find a song to channel your feelings.

It worked in high school, so why not now? Allow ample time to be upset. You have a legit reason to be — the person you built up in your head doesn’t feel the same way. Give yourself a weekend to mourn the crush, find your anthem, and get it out of your system. Just make sure not to contact them during this time since there’s no way that will make the situation better.

Write them a letter, but then tear it up.

It’s therapeutic. Tell them why you think they’re wrong and what they’re missing out on. Then get rid of it. It’s a good way to remind yourself that there are plenty of fish in the sea.

Remember that this doesn’t mean the end of your friendship.

If you crushed on someone who was once a friend, you might be a little worried that you screwed it up. Yes, things may be a little awkward and tense at first, but it will get better. If this person was so crush-worthy, they’d realize that they still want you in their life once your feeling dissipate. So, take a break from them for now and start healing if you want this to be a distant memory.

Try to figure out what qualities you liked in them and see if anyone else fits the bill.

You don’t want to be the person who constantly has overlapping crushes, but the best way to get over someone is to focus energy on someone else. It could even be someone fictional, as you take a bit of an emotional break from actual romance. Every single person you like is a step up from the last. Figure out what it was that attracted you to your crush, and see if it’s a quality you can find in someone else.

Plan a vacation.

It may seem easier said than done, but it doesn’t need to be an elaborate vacation — maybe just a weekend with a long-distance friend. Get your mind focused on something other than the rejection. Planning can be a lot of fun, and leaving for a little bit is a great way to feel like you’re starting over. You also never know what types of people you’ll meet on the road, so it can be a real adventure.

Meditate.

Have you ever tried meditating? It’s a great way to feel one with your body and completely clear your mind. By doing a few meditation sessions, it’ll remind you that this isn’t the end of the world. Eventually, you’ll find someone better. And no matter what, there are plenty of perks in being single.

Spend time with your best friend.

Your best friend is there to lift you up when things get tough and remind you what a catch you are. Put them into action now. Go out to a bar, grab some coffee, or treat yourself to a really expensive lunch and be happy that you’ve found someone great who’ll always remind you of your worth.

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