Why I Love Being The Unmarried, Go-To Bridesmaid

Why I Love Being The Unmarried, Go-To Bridesmaid ©iStock/_chupacabra_

Ugh — another wedding, another “dress” and more friends trying to hook me up. Sounds horrible right? I know some women hate being the unmarried, go-to bridesmaid for their friends, but I actually love it. Sure, it has its downsides, but overall, it’s fun. Maybe it’s because I have really good friends who don’t push me too far. Maybe I just like the thrill of making ridiculous looking bridesmaid dresses seem sexy or at least less horrendous. Before you groan at being the single bridesmaid again, think of all the perks you get:

  1. I get awesome gifts. Yeah, you have to buy the bride a gift, but you also get one. It’s the bride’s way of thanking you for being her actual maid for the week leading up to the wedding. From free dinners to free spa treatments, the gifts are pretty damn nice.
  2. I know how not to be a Bridezilla. I’ve seen my fair share of Bridezillas. I guess there’s some bridal demon that possesses brides-to-be. It’s like the ceremony exorcises the demon and suddenly, my friend’s back to normal. I’ve watched closely and I think I’ve figured out how to avoid those little demons myself.
  3. Three words: hot single guys. I’m not saying I go to a wedding looking for love. Seriously, that’s way too cliche. However, I won’t lie and say it’s not a great ego boost being hit on by a lot of hot single guys. While all my other girlfriends are coupled up, I’m free to mix, mingle, and find someone to get me out of this ruffled disaster of a dress.
  4. I don’t have to find clothes. Most special events require me to brave the far reaches of my closet. Digging for something nice to wear is a pain in the ass, especially when you discover nothing fits. At least as the go-to bridesmaid, I never have to try to find a dress to wear to the wedding. Then again, sometimes I wish I chose my own dress.
  5. No one expects me to look great. It’s the bride’s day, after all. I’m just there to fill up space at her side and walk a groomsman down the aisle. Bridesmaids aren’t supposed to look incredible. We’re just supposed to match. It’s like being the girl at prom that’s so popular, no one cares what she wears.
  6. Some of my friends have taste. I know I’ve been bashing dresses, but honestly, at least half of my friends have taste. This means I get to wear a great dress in front of several hundred people and I’m not ashamed to wear it again. It’s like having your cake and wearing it, too.
  7. I love playing bouquet tackle. I honestly don’t care about catching the bouquet — it’s not like marriage is something in my immediate future — but I do like bouquet tackle. You know, that part where all the single women suddenly turn into pro-football players on their own individual teams. I hate to brag, but I’m the official pro, even in slick high heels.
  8. I’m reminded why I’m not married. Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy for my friends, but seeing all the stress and drama building up the big day, I realize why I’m not married. Honestly, I’ve had several couple friends almost break up just over wedding planning. If the day you get married is that stressful, how bad is actual marriage?
  9. I like all the “advice” I get. The first few weddings pissed me off. I was hurt at first, but then I just got angry. My inner Hulk came out. I know all the advice about finding love is meant to help me, but I’m fine on my own. Now, I like to finish their sentences and play drinking games for every time I hear certain phrases.
  10. I get to see how unrealistic those Pinterest weddings are. I think I’m the only one of my friends who doesn’t have Pinterest wedding boards. Can you tell I’m not really the wedding type? I’m all too familiar with my friends’ Pinterest weddings. I also have a co-starring role in the final, nothing-like-Pinterest wedding.
  11. I love seeing my friends get a happy ending. While some of my friends make me think marriage isn’t worth it, some remind me that love truly is a beautiful thing. Watching the pure joy on their faces, seeing how there’s no one else it the world at that moment and seeing them get a happy ending makes me believe in love. Be a bridesmaid enough and it’s hard not to be optimistic about love.
  12. I’m getting plenty of free planning tips. I don’t need a wedding planner at this point. I’ve learned what to do and what not to do. I’ve also gotten plenty of great ideas. One day, all my friends are going to come to my wedding and see little bits of each of their own.
  13. It’s a free party. Do I really need a better reason than this? All my friends in one place, acting crazy and having a great time? I’m so in.
  14. I’m great at pulling everything together. I’m great under pressure, so when the bride starts freaking out and everything seems to be falling apart, I’m the one who helps pull it all together. Even when I’m not the maid of honor, I still end up being the one doing a lot of the behind the scenes work. Seeing my hard work pay off is insanely satisfying.
  15. I get attention without all the stress. Sure, the bride gets attention, but so do the bridesmaids. I’m able to get plenty of attention without dealing with all the stress that comes with actually getting married. It’s awesome!
  16. I can embarrass myself and not worry. I’m supposed to act crazy. I’m at a wedding and I’m a bridesmaid — it’s kind of my job. So if I want to dance like an idiot or sing bad karaoke, it’s fine. Everyone’s just going to laugh and join in.
  17. Plenty of free food. My favorite part. I love to eat. I’m also one of the first to fill up a plate. The only hard part is waiting for my friends to cut their cake. Did I mention I love cake?

See, being everyone’s bridesmaid isn’t so bad. Stop fussing and just enjoy it.

Crystal Crowder is a freelance writer and blogger. She's a tech geek at heart, but loves telling it like it is when it comes to love, beauty and style. She's enjoys writing music, poetry and fiction and curling up with a great book. You can find her on Twitter @ccrowderwrites or check out her other writing on Medium.