How To Love A Woman Who’s Been Cheated On Before

How To Love A Woman Who’s Been Cheated On Before

Being cheated on can feel even worse than being broken up with, because it means your partner willingly betrayed you and broke your trust. Knowing that he was capable of such an act could make you swear off of dating completely. Of course, if you ever love again, there are a few things your future partners should know:

  1. Give her as much time as she needs. Don’t expect her to be dropping an “I love you” after the first date. She doesn’t want to get attached right away, because she’s already been through enough heartbreak. She’ll want to move as slowly as she can in order to figure out if you’re really worth her time.
  2. Don’t make her feel inferior. If you see a pretty lady, do your best to avoid staring at her chest. Don’t go on and on about how amazing your female coworkers are, either. She’ll assume that you’ll want to sleep with them, and that’s the quickest way to lose her.
  3. Don’t get annoyed by her constant questions. If you go out, she’s going to want to know where you’re going and what friends you’ll be seeing. If you’re smiling at your phone, she’s going to want to know who you’ve been texting. They’re not unreasonable questions, so ease her paranoia by answering them honestly.
  4. Let her talk about her ex. The only way to understand what she’s been through is by hearing about what happened in her past relationship. Suck it up and let her talk about her ex, at least at first, so you can have an idea of how she’s feeling. After that, you can ban his name from conversation.
  5. Remind her that you love her. Being cheated on might’ve made her lose some of her confidence. That’s why you shouldn’t assume that she knows how much you care. Actually tell her, because she needs to hear the words.
  6. Open up about your own baggage. Let her know she’s not alone. If you’ve dated crappy people in the past, tell her about your own experiences. It’ll be easier for her to open up to you if you open up to her, too.
  7. Give her space when she needs it. She won’t always be in the mood to be lovey-dovey. Sometimes, she’ll want to sit in her room alone or go out on the town with her friends. Don’t get angry when she asks for space, because it’s healthy to spend some time apart.
  8. Answer her text messages. If you have the time to answer her texts, then do so. If you leave her waiting for too long, she’s going to have her doubts about what you’re really doing. Unless you want her to wonder if you’re cheating like her ex did, you should try to keep her in the loop.
  9. Know that she’ll never cheat on you. She knows what it feels like to be cheated on. That’s why it’s safe to say that she’ll never cheat on you. It’s not something you need to worry about.
  10. Always be honest with her. If she finds out that you’ve lied to her about something small, she’s going to wonder if you’ve been lying about bigger things, as well. Once you lose her trust, it’ll be hard to earn it back, so just be honest with her from the start.
Holly is a science fiction and horror writer, who has recently been published by Flash Fiction Press, Infective Ink, and Popcorn Press. You can find more of her nonfiction articles on All Women Stalk, The Talko, and News Cult.