Meeting The Parents? How To Make Your Partner’s Family Fall In Love With You

The holidays are upon us, and for many couples, it’s the time we all look forward to and dread at the same time: meeting the parents. If your partner is ready to take you home to meet their family for the first time and you’re basically crapping your pants with anxiety about the situation, relax. You’re amazing! That alone should be enough to make your partner’s family love you, but if it’s not, here are a few extra tips.

  1. Bring a little gift. While you shouldn’t have to butter anyone up to make them like you, bringing along a little gift when you meet your partner’s loved ones for the first time goes a long way. You can either think up something yourself if you’re creative in that way, or even ask your partner for tips. Do his parents like a certain kind of wine? Are they lovers of fancy chocolates? It doesn’t have to be (and shouldn’t be) anything extravagant or over-the-top, just a little token to show you appreciate them hosting you.
  2. Show an interest in them. You’re dating your partner, not his parents, but if you want to make his family love you, you need to show some interest in them as people too. That shouldn’t be too hard, particularly if they do something cool as a profession or have some great life experiences they like to share around the dinner table. Show them that you care about getting to know them as well and you’ll be golden.
  3. Keep the PDA to the bare minimum. It’s great that you and your partner are so in love, but your first time meeting the parents isn’t the time to be hanging all over each other, kissing and holding hands and generally doing things that are better left for when you’re alone. Be respectful. You’re in mixed company.
  4. Don’t criticize your partner in front of them. Your partner’s parents are always going to consider your partner to be the apple of their eye, so they won’t take kindly to you talking them down or criticizing them in any way. Sure, they should know your partner isn’t perfect, but you’ll never make your partner’s family love you if you’re tearing them down. Why would you want to do that anyway?
  5. Offer to help out. If they’ve made dinner or hosted you for another social event, there’s no better way to endear yourself to them than by offering to help clean up. Whether that’s doing dishes, taking the trash out, or wiping down surfaces, pitching in as if you’re part of the family is way more likely to make you part of the family, if you know what I mean.
  6. Be your normal charming self. At the end of the day, your partner fell for you for a reason, so you already have that going for you. Be yourself and show off all the wonderful qualities that drew your partner to you in the first place and you’re sure to be in with their family as well.
Jennifer Still is a writer and editor with more than 10 years of experience. The managing editor of Bolde, she has bylines in Vanity Fair, Business Insider, The New York Times, Glamour, Bon Appetit, and many more. You can follow her on Twitter @jenniferlstill
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