I Might Miss You But I Absolutely Don’t Need You

So yeah, we broke up. I’m certainly devastated but that won’t last long. Why? Because even though I might miss you now, I won’t miss you forever. Time will heal my wounds, my heart will grow stronger, and I’ll learn from my mistakes. I’ll be happy again and you’ll be a distant memory – just a blip from my past. So while I might love you now, I will never need you again.

  1. I just miss the guy you used to be. When I mourn the relationship we had, I don’t see the bad times. Not yet, anyway. In the moments I miss you, I really just miss the guy I fell in love with. I miss our happiest moments. That’s not who you are anymore, so what I actually miss is a memory and it’s not something I can ever get back.
  2. Change can be scary. Humans have an incredible ability to adapt to their surroundings, but we do still like a daily routine. It settles us and makes us feel like we have some control over our lives. Part of what I’ll miss most about you is the routine I had while dating you. Our breakup means all of my routines have been shot to hell. But that’s okay because I’ll adapt and I’ll be just fine.
  3. This sadness is temporary. Make no mistake – I will get over you. I might be sad right now and I might be cuddling your sweatshirt because it still faintly has your scent, but that won’t last forever. I can get through this because I know there’s a light at the end of the tunnel. Pretty soon, I’ll be back to my old self again.
  4. There’s a reason we broke up. I wouldn’t miss you like this if we were still together. And the reason we aren’t together is that things weren’t working out between us. No matter who said what or who left whom, our relationship ended and that’s something I still need to accept. If were really meant to be together, wouldn’t we still be together?
  5. I was fine before you and I will be again. Don’t let the empty takeout boxes and sloppy t-shirt fool you – I have a warrior inside of me. That strength will let me wallow for a sec, but then it’ll put me back together and help me move on. I got this.
  6. Now I get to focus completely on myself. Breakups remind us how important self-care and self-love are. Now that I’m on my own again, I can spoil myself and always put myself first. I couldn’t do that with you but now I can.
  7. True love celebrates independence. When the love you have with someone is that epic forever kind of love, you should never feel like you “need” them in order to survive. Need is linked to infatuation and extreme but fleeting emotions. So I don’t actually “need” anyone – especially you.
  8. Rebound sex is so much fun. Sure, it might be empty and not as passionate as it is with someone you love, but it’s still a total blast to screw someone with no strings attached. It’s also a nice reminder that there are other people in this world that can get me off as quickly and effectively as you could – which makes the whole moving on process SO much easier.
  9. Eventually, I’ll remember all the bad things about you. Once the good memories begin to fade, the bad ones will come crashing in. I’ll remember the fights, all the times you made me feel unloved, all the times you made me question my worth and I’ll no longer miss you at all.
  10. No matter what happens, I’ll be just fine. Because I’m newly single, it’s natural to hope that my “soulmate” is out there. But even if I decide to stay single forever and realize that my best friends are my soulmates, I’ll be okay. This will pass. I’ll forget about you, and I’ll resume my happy life once again.
is a freelance writer for Bustle and Petcha, and editor for Wise Bread. She suffers from separation anxiety, and can't bear to be away from her dog for more than 20 minutes. Her dog doesn't seem to care either way. Sweater season is her favorite season.