All parents have their own approach to raising their kids, and while some people might not understand that approach, it should still be respected. However, that didn’t stop some Internet commenters from questioning one mom’s very particular rule banning her newborn’s grandparents from changing the baby’s diaper to protect the child’s privacy.
Taking to the British parenting message board Mumsnet, one mom admitted she was furious after finding her mother-in-law had changed her newborn baby’s diaper without first asking permission. It’s hard to imagine why that would be a problem, but it all comes down to protecting the child.
“I’m very keen on consent and protecting my baby’s privacy and prefer that only myself and my partner are the ones to change DS’s nappy (6 months),” she wrote. “Obviously, I understand if we’re not available due to nursery eventually or if someone else is babysitting then I’m happy for someone else to do it however this has not yet been the case.”
The mom believed the grandparents had no right to step in
She went on to say that her MIL overstepped by getting involved. “A while ago my MIL was over and my baby started crying and rather than just give him back decided to take it upon herself to change him (I was standing right there) he continued crying throughout the change and she gave him back straight after but it annoyed me as it wasn’t her place to change him,” she continued.
The mom went on to say that she did keep her mouth shut at the time. However, she’s changed her approach and will be making her rules clear. “I didn’t say anything at the time DS was 4 months and I was trying to be nice and friendly but starting to find her more overbearing and I’m getting close to drawing a line,” she explained.
While some people agreed the mom is well within her rights, others questioned whether she was being too over the-top.
“It’s good to be aware but you do sound paranoid. They are related and you were right there watching. Did something happen to you as a child? If so, maybe you need therapy to talk through things. Or maybe you could have said, it’s OK I can do that or something,” one commenter remarked.
Another suggested: “So nursery workers or babysitters can change your child but their grandparent can’t? I suspect this is more about your feelings towards your MIL than anything to do with privacy and consent (consent being a ridiculous concept for a small baby who has no capacity to give informed consent at that age).”