My Husband Convinced Me To Try Swinging & It Strengthened Our Marriage

My relationship with my husband has always been an open and honest one. We’re always upfront about our needs and desires and we do our best to accommodate each other, even if one person requests a spouse swap. My husband convinced me to try swinging and shockingly, it wasn’t the worst idea ever.

1. I won’t lie: I had my reservations. When my husband first brought up swinging, he spoke of a few coworkers. They claimed it strengthened their marriages and was really fun. My spouse has always had an unusually high sex drive and I could see the wheels turning. Before he could get ahead of himself, I had to ask a few questions: Was I not enough for him anymore? Did he require multiple partners to satisfy his lust? He didn’t want to hurt me and insisted that he was more intrigued and curious than anything else. He wanted to experience something new with me and to live out a few fantasies. I still wasn’t sold, but I was curious, so I said I’d consider it.
2. We had a great marriage—how could it get any better? We may have had our ups and downs, but our relationship was rock solid. How was swinging supposed to improve what we already had? My husband concluded it was the freedom and trust that would make us stronger. There’s something about living out sexual fantasies with the knowledge and permission of your spouse that strengthens a marriage. It seemed like a stretch, but I was willing to go with it. After getting married, it was a struggle to know I’d never sleep with anyone new ever again. I often daydreamed about having sex with other men but left it at that. I’d never cheat on my husband, but was swinging cheating?
3. Deciding to swing was a conscious and lengthy decision. We shared specific details or our fantasies and watched a few pornos together to illustrate what we were curious about. We also discussed taking things slowly before going all-in. Interestingly, the conversations made me feel like my secret desires weren’t so silly. It was freeing to share the things I’d been daydreaming about for years. His easy acceptance of them made me feel like we were on the same wavelength. Once we could agree on what we wanted, we felt ready to take the next step.
4. We had no idea how to start but we eased into it. We figured the simplest solution was to go to an online dating site, set up a profile, and clearly explain what we wanted. Unsurprisingly, no one responded. We eventually found an app specifically for swingers and it happened to allow anonymous group conversations. Once we got the ball rolling, people started messaging us and it was really exciting. It also had a positive impact on my sex life with my husband.
5. Our sex life reached new levels of hotness. We weren’t even sleeping with other people yet and we couldn’t keep our hands off each other! Every little thing set us off. If I wore shorts, he’d have to touch my thighs. If he took off his shirt to change, I had to run my hands up his chest. We were animals and we sought sexual release several times a day. This led to recording videos, taking pictures, and visiting sex shops more often. Of course, we also had to take teasing pictures to send our friends on the swinging site. Soon, we were getting several invitations to meet other couples at hotel rooms.
6. The first encounter was very spur-of-the-moment. While participating in a group chat with some pretty amazing people, we got an invitation to meet up the same day. They said we didn’t have to participate but we were welcome to see for ourselves how things worked. We quickly showered, shaved, dressed up and drove to the hotel. My heart was pounding and I didn’t know what to expect. I was stunned when a gorgeous naked woman opened the door and invited us in. We watched in fascination as the pair went at it right in front of us. It got us hot so we started playing with each other, thinking we could just have sex next to them. We thought wrong.
7. You never forget your first time. As things started to heat up, our inhibitions disappeared. We were so into the scene unfolding before us that we couldn’t sit still. While I was kissing my husband, he removed my bra and shirt. The gorgeous girl appeared out of nowhere and asked if she could play with my breasts. I was feeling it and my husband nodded his consent. That initial touch was all it took for us to dive head-first into our first swap. I wound up having sex with everyone in the room. It was the most amazing thing I’d ever participated in, so when there was a knock on the door, I didn’t even flinch. It was another guy. We weren’t expecting him but decided to go with it anyway. I wound up having sex with him as well and went home that night completely satisfied.
8. The morning after was interesting. We didn’t talk much about what happened until the next day. We loved the experience, so there was no question of whether or not we were going to do it again. Still, the previous night’s events inspired us to create a few ground rules. First, we would only play with other couples, no more unexpected extras. Second, we would only play in the same room and at the same time. Third, we wouldn’t participate in any more spur-of-the-moment rendezvous. We would plan out who we would see, when and where. The rules would keep us honest and would also protect us from unexpected situations.
9. Swinging really has made our marriage even better. We had a lot of laughs during the initial phases and we joke about it to this day. Every step of the way was filled with fun and we fell into the habit of encouraging one another. We’re also more open to sharing our thoughts, fantasies, and hopes. We’ve always had a great relationship, but it’s like we’ve leveled up. No topic is too embarrassing to talk about now. After going through something so fun and exciting, we’re even more supportive than we were before. Somewhere between the accidental orgy and now, we’ve found a way to deepen our relationship. Swinging is not for everyone, but it works just fine for us.