If you live in a major city with a solid public transportation situation, that’s one thing, but if you live in the suburbs or anywhere that having a car not only comes in handy but is kind of a necessity, dating a guy without one is a big no-no. Here’s what’s his carlessness means about him:
- HE’S IRRESPONSIBLE WITH MONEY. What grown man do you know that’s content with walking everywhere or bumming a ride from his friends? It’s a totally different ballgame if his car is in the shop or he’s in the process of looking for another one to buy. I’m talking about the men who don’t have a car or who did have one but it was repossessed. That shows that he either doesn’t have any money or the money that he does earn is wasted on less important things.
- HE’S AFRAID OF COMMITMENT. If this guy can’t commit to a monthly car payment or regular maintenance on his car, what makes you think he’s ready to commit to you? All he needs is something basic to get back and forth to work and to drive recreationally. But if he can’t even commit to paying for a car, he’s showing you that he’s not ready to take responsibility for himself and he’s content with not being tied down. Nope.
- HE’S COMFORTABLE MOOCHING OFF OF YOU. He’s using you. There’s no better way to put it. If he doesn’t have a car and you do, he’ll be riding around on your dime, using your gas. If he gets into an accident, it’s on your insurance and you’ll be responsible for it, not him. If you don’t mind being held responsible for his mishaps then that’s on you. I doubt he’d be willing or able to help pay for damages incurred while driving your car. If he was, then he’d have his own car and his own car insurance to ruin, not yours.
- HE’S INDECISIVE. If he’s not motivated to buy his own car and handle his own business, what makes you think that he’ll be decisive in areas within your relationship? If he’s gotten comfortable and he’s not willing to make a decision on what he’s going to do in regards to his own transportation, he’s a dud and he clearly refuses to use his brain capacity to think and make things happen. That’s not something you should want in a man who’s supposed to be your partner in a relationship.
- HE DOESN’T HAVE CLEAR GOALS FOR HIMSELF. Everyone has goals or things they want to accomplish in life. If he doesn’t have a car, what’s he even doing with his life? How is he planning to go on job interviews or travel around locally? He clearly isn’t thinking about the future. He’s taking things day-by-day, seeing what happens. That kind of attitude isn’t bad in and of itself but it’s a major warning sign.
- HE’D RATHER CONTROL YOU BY USING YOU AND YOUR CAR. You’ve made things too easy for him. Why should he get his own car when he has you? By you allowing him to use your car, it makes it easier to keep tabs on you. If he drops you off somewhere, now he knows where you are, who you’re with, and how long you’ll be there. Therefore, if he doesn’t like who you’re with, don’t be surprised if he pops up to take you home.
- IT’S NOT HIS CAR, SO WHY WOULD HE TAKE CARE OF IT? Sometimes people who rent (homes or apartments) don’t really take care of the property since they don’t own it. The same principle applies here. It’s not his car he’s driving around in, it’s yours. So don’t expect it to be spotlessly clean, have a full tank of gas, or have things fixed that need maintenance. Your name is on the title and insurance information, not his.
- HE HAS A LOT TO SAY BUT CAN’T BACK IT UP. Talking a good game but not following through is a honed talent. When your guy tells you his plans to get a new car, what type of car he wants, etc., he’s feeding you exactly what you want to hear. It’s a pipe dream if you’re not putting your words and thoughts to action.
- HE’S UNSURE OF HIMSELF. Now, this is something he won’t tell you, but it’s something you can determine by his actions. A man’s confidence is generally linked to him knowing who he is, what he’s doing with his life, and his feelings for you. Not having something as basic as his own car and no plans to get one shows a complete lack of motivation and confidence. In other words, it’s not a great idea.