Why You Should Never Date Someone Who Isn’t ALL About You

Why You Should Never Date Someone Who Isn’t ALL About You ©iStock/Aleksandar Nakic

Always feel like your second on his list? Why do you put up with it? If he’s not all about you, then tell him to move on. You deserve to date the right guy, not some jerk who’s more obsessed with his phone or Xbox than you. You have better things to do. He might be great to look at and amazing in bed, but eventually any guy who’s not all about you is just going to make you miserable. Don’t waste your time or you could find yourself going through some of these things.

  1. You’ll always feel a little insecure. When you’re always getting blown off for his friends, his hobbies or whatever other excuse he comes up with, you start feeling a little insecure. Any guy worth dating makes you feel secure. If you’re always doubting yourself because of him, dump him now.
  2. He’ll never listen. This type of guy has other priorities. He doesn’t give a damn about how your day was. He might nod and smile like a good little boy, but ask him what you just said and all you’ll get is the blank stare. How do you handle it? Get his attention, tell him goodbye and walk away.
  3. Compromise isn’t in his vocabulary. When you date the right guy, he’s not afraid to compromise. Guys who aren’t all about you don’t even know the meaning of the word. He thinks compromise is having to pick you up when he’d rather be lounging on his couch at home. Yeah, that’s a real keeper.
  4. Forget all about your interests. Sharing your interests with each other is one of the best parts of dating someone. Forget all about this exciting experience. It’s just not going to happen. You’ll know all about his interests, but the moment you try to share, he’s too busy or comes up with something better for the two of you to do.
  5. No one knows you exist. Try dating a guy who’s all about you. He can’t wait to tell his family and friends about the wonderful woman he’s dating. He’s proud to show you off and introduce you to everyone. A guy who doesn’t really care avoids telling anyone he’s with you. After all, life’s all about him and you might get in the way of his spotlight.
  6. He’s a jerk. It’s really as simple as that. A guy who cares anything about you at least tries to make you happy and treat you well. He might not always succeed, but the attempt counts. Does he ignore you, text all through dinner, make fun of you all the time and just generally treat you like crap? Yep, he’s all about something, but it’s not you.
  7. No support. Can you imagine dating a guy who’s not supportive of you? Shouldn’t you be able to call him when you’re down and he helps make you feel better? It’s a nice fantasy, but it’s not going to happen with a guy like this. Support means he bothers to get to know you and makes time for you. It’s just not this guy’s style.
  8. Sex is a one way street. Sex isn’t just about one person. Great, mind blowing sex means the two of you aren’t just focused on your own pleasure, but each other’s. That’s kind of difficult to do when he’s only interested in himself. He doesn’t take time to figure out what you like or even make sure you get yours.
  9. His life comes first always. Want him to meet your family? How about doubling with your best friend? Go ahead, try to get him to do something you want to do. No luck? What you want to do doesn’t matter. It’s all about his life and what he wants. If you date this guy, that’s how your life is going to be. You definitely deserve better.
  10. Nothing’s exciting anymore. Sharing exciting news or talking about your hobbies with your boyfriend is always fun. Unless of course, he cares about everything else in his life more than you. Over time, you stop getting excited. You know he’s just going to either ignore you or change the subject. He’s boring and an ass. Leave him already!
  11. He never notices how beautiful you are. It’s not narcissistic to want to hear a compliment now and again. A guy who’s totally in to you loves to compliment you. He can’t help himself from telling you you’re beautiful or he loves the new way you’re wearing your hair. The wrong guy tells you how great he looks, but you’re lucky if he even notices you’re there with him.
  12. It’ll never last. A guy like this isn’t going to stick around. The moment something new comes up in his life, he’ll leave you. You’re not important to him. If you’re not making him look good or you’re not doing everything he wants, he’s going to move on. He won’t even be upset. Don’t you think you should get rid of him first?
  13. You’ll always be second. You should never be second to anything. When you date the right guy, he’ll consider you one of the most important things in his life along with his family and closest friends. With the other type of guy, you never stand a chance at receiving the same love, respect or attention as anything else in his life.
  14. You lose your friends. Your friends won’t give up on you, but you just might leave them. Some women try so hard to please the wrong type of guy that they alienate themselves from all the people who care. You should never have to try that hard to get a guy’s attention. If he can’t make it all about you without you giving up everything, then he’s not worth it.

Great guys put you first. It’s not complicated. He treats you right, you treat him right and you all live happily ever after or something disgustingly cheesy like that.

Crystal Crowder is a freelance writer and blogger. She's a tech geek at heart, but loves telling it like it is when it comes to love, beauty and style. She's enjoys writing music, poetry and fiction and curling up with a great book. You can find her on Twitter @ccrowderwrites or check out her other writing on Medium.