No, I Don’t Want To Join Your Open Relationship—12 Reasons Tinder Has Gotten Weird AF

Like any single AF girl, I’ve tried my hand at every dating app that there is, so of course I’ve used Tinder. It seems impossible to date these days and NOT have an account. While I’ve had success in the past, the truth is that these days, logging onto the app is an exercise in creepiness and disaster. Here are 12 reasons Tinder has gotten super weird:

  1. The normal people seem to be totally gone. Back in the day (AKA two years ago), Tinder had some pretty decent guys. I would swipe right on a lot of them and go on actual first dates. Everyone always talked about how strange Tinder was but I never saw it that way. It just seemed like a way to meet new people. Today, that’s over. I can swipe for an hour and find absolutely no normal guys. It’s all half naked bathroom selfies and way too many bros.
  2. It’s more of a game than ever before. The biggest criticism of Tinder is that guys use it just for fun and to see how many matches they can get. They love feeling like there are tons of options around and they have zero interest in meeting anyone. I never believed that, but now I’m starting to wonder. It feels like a game that has nothing to do with dating.
  3. Guys message me with “hey” and then ignore me. Why does this happen? I have no idea. I always answer because there’s really no reason not to, and yet once I’ve responded, I never hear from this person ever again. It’s definitely confusing.
  4. Whenever I get close to a date, I’m told he’s in an open relationship. Or even an open marriage. This has happened so many times to me in the past few months, it would be funny if it wasn’t so frustrating. I’m starting to think that everyone using this app is already dating someone. Is it too much to ask for a single guy who wants only one girlfriend?
  5. No one fills out their bios. This is a pretty big problem. If a guy’s in an open relationship, that’s his business, and if he says so in his bio then I know to steer clear. But if he’s written nothing or has failed to mention it and he tells me while we’re making plans to meet for a drink, that’s super sketchy and super uncool. If guys would give more information about themselves, things would be so much better.
  6. I’ve had more canceled dates using Tinder than anything else. I totally get that online dating can be tricky and that sometimes, dates don’t end up happening. There are a million reasons why, from cold feet to deciding that this person isn’t worth meeting after all. It sounds harsh but that’s the way that it goes. I just hate that when I do manage to get a date on Tinder, I get canceled on. It’s getting old.
  7. I get matches that I swear I didn’t swipe on. Does this happen to everyone or just me? Either way, it’s annoying AF. It’s hard to put my trust into an app that tells me that I’ve swiped on someone when I haven’t at all.
  8. I get matches that live in the US when I’m in Toronto. My distance settings are fairly close and yet, despite the fact that I live in a Canadian city, I get matches that actually live in the States. It’s pretty weird.
  9. I don’t want to date guys who are in town for the weekend. After using Tinder for a while, I realize that most of the time, I’m swiping left not because the guys aren’t attractive but because they don’t actually live in my city. I don’t want to date guys who are only in town for the weekend and I don’t get why this seems to be 90 percent of the guys on this app.
  10. There is a limit on swiping right. When I’m told that I can’t swipe for another 12 hours because I’ve swiped right on too many guys, I want to scream… especially on the days when it seems impossible to get any matches at all. I don’t get why there has to be a limit. Doesn’t that defeat the purpose?
  11. It seems like too much to ask for a real first date. I feel like the most ridiculous person ever for thinking that I could use this app and go on an actual date. That feels like an impossible wish at this point, and I just don’t get why. Does no one want to actually meet anyone?
  12. There doesn’t seem to be any point. When I message guys, they don’t answer. When guys message me, it’s at 5 a.m. when I’m obviously sleeping or it’s super obvious that they only want a hookup. The last time I went on a Tinder date was last October, so is there any point? I want to go on dates, not deal with all this strange stuff. And that’s why Tinder has become way too weird for me.
Aya Tsintziras is a freelance lifestyle writer and editor from Toronto, Canada. In addition to writing about dating and relationships for Bolde, she also writes about movies, TV, and video games for ScreenRant and GameRant. She has a Political Science degree from the University of Toronto and a Masters of Journalism from Ryerson University. You can find her on Twitter @ayatsintziras and on Instagram @aya.tsintziras.