No Guy Worth Your Time Should Ever Make You Feel Like This

No Guy Worth Your Time Should Ever Make You Feel Like This ©iStock/Constantinis

When you’re in a relationship, the general assumption is that you’ll feel loved, valued, and cared for by your partner — but that’s not always the case. While every couple experiences their share of ups and downs, if he ever makes you feel any of these things, it’s time to dump him and move on:

  1. Alone. If your partner leaves you hanging you feel left out all the time, it’s time to consider why you’ve even wasting your time with him. You deserve to be with someone who wants you around and includes you in his life regularly, not just when he can be bothered.
  2. Afraid. Your relationship should be a kind of a stronghold, where you can take refuge when the world knocks you off your feet. However, if you can’t even seek comfort in it and you feel like you have nowhere to turn, it’s really not meant to be.
  3. Insecure. Even the best relationships come with the occasional insecurity, and that’s OK. As long as your relationship with each other, despite its imperfections, gives you a sense of security, you’re in the right place. It’s when you never know where you stand or if you can count on him when there’s a problem.
  4. Belittled. Who cares if you never graduated college or you’re working a minimum wage job? Who gives a damn whether you snore too loud or you’re sometimes disorganized? You want someone who embraces your weaknesses and shortcomings and finds them endearing, not someone who puts you down because he’s a judgmental douchebag.
  5. Manipulated. You’re a grown woman who doesn’t need to be told what you should and shouldn’t do. If you notice signs that your partner is controlling how you make decisions and what you’re doing in your day-to-day life, get out ASAP, because you really don’t need that BS.
  6. Suffocated. When the relationship is just starting out, it’s normal to want to spend 24/7 together and to be kind of protective of each other, but that’s way different from being possessive. If your partner shows signs of the latter, say bye. If you don’t, you’ll end up being suffocated by how unreasonably clingy and jealous he can be.
  7. Neglected. You’re in a relationship to be happy and feel loved without any BS. You’re also in it to return those same gestures. However, if your efforts are not reciprocated and you feel that he gets more than he gives, it’s a sign that you need to even the scales. If he’s continued being neglectful of you and the relationship, leave and don’t come back, ever.
  8. Stagnant. Growing as a person and growing together with your boyfriend are two important goals you should aspire to in your relationship. However, when all you have are goals and you don’t actually take any action, you’ll feel stuck. If you can’t motivate yourself and your significant other isn’t enough to motivate you, you’ll need to rethink the relationship. Something is clearly wrong.
  9. Unworthy. Despite the imperfections you see in yourself, your partner should help you focus on the good and make you feel confident your abilities and the wonderful things about yourself. If you’re feeling down because he seems so much better than you and he actively encourages this kind of attitude, that’s a toxic relationship you’re better off without.
Maine Belonio is a twenty-something mom and writer who has a penchant for coffee, long distance running, Tolkien, Switchfoot, and Jesus. Find her broken, honest, and brave musings at