No More Games And Nonsense—I Just Want A Guy Who’s Direct

I’m tired of dealing with wishy-washy guys. All I’ve ever wanted in a relationship is a guy who gives it to me straight. I love it when a guy is direct with me. It might feel harsh in the moment but it’s better than being dragged from pillar to post and not knowing where I stand.

  1. That way I’ll know exactly who I’m dealing with. I’ve come across my fair share of guys who act like they’re the relationship-type but were really just wanting a fun fling to pass the time. The guys who do this are usually pretty vague and don’t talk a lot about their needs and desires relationship-wise. This is a huge red flag for me. If he’s being wishy-washy, I know he’s probably not the guy for me.
  2. I’m a big girl and I can handle the truth. There is no need to tip-toe around me. I’m a grown woman and can handle the truth whether it be “I want a real relationship” or “I only want something casual.” Whatever it is, I want to hear it. I’m not gonna cry and get upset; if anything, I’ll have more respect for him.
  3. I won’t be wasting any time. This is probably the biggest reason why I only go for guys who are direct with me. Guys can go a pretty long time in a relationship without saying anything about it. They’re just hoping I won’t find out that they’re just using me, so they avoid the subject for months and months and then wonder why I get mad when they break up with me. I don’t want any more of my precious time to be wasted. That’s why I only pursue relationships when he lets me know what he’s looking for.
  4.  They make way better boyfriends. I like guys who are direct mainly for practical reasons, but I also find they just make better boyfriends. They have a good head on their shoulders and aren’t afraid to speak their minds. For some reason, I just feel more safe with a guy like that.
  5. It’s kinda hot. I think pretty much every woman would agree that it’s actually kinda hot when a guy tells it like it is. Honesty is sexy! It also takes a lot of courage to tell a woman your intentions with her and it seriously makes me fall in love when I find a guy who can do that.
  6. I can’t read minds. Why does every guy think that I just know what’s going on, like I’m a mind reader? I think it’s safe to say that the majority of girls err on the side of hoping for a long-term relationship, whereas a lot of guys prefer a casual one. I’m not saying this is true across the board, I’m just saying that it’s more likely. The fact that the guy I’m dating is hoping I’ll catch on that he only wants sex is pretty wishful thinking.
  7. If he isn’t being direct, I’ll assume he’s not interested in a real relationship. If he’s being quiet about our relationship, I’ll assume that there isn’t one because history has taught me that when a guy is being awkward and vague, it means he doesn’t want to date me long-term. It’s sad but true. I don’t want to end up getting hurt, so a guy who actually has the courage to speak up and tell me what he’s feeling is the safer bet.
  8. I know I’d be able to trust him. If he’s willing to be up-front about our relationship, I know I’ll be able to trust him with pretty much anything else that comes up along the way. Guys who keep quiet are sketchy to me. Either they’re hiding something or just don’t have the confidence to communicate what they want. Both of these traits are really unattractive to me.
  9. I’m tired of “guessing” whether or not I’m in a relationship. I seriously can’t stand it when I start dating someone and I’m just expected to assume what it is. Are we on our way to something serious? Is his sole intention to just sleep with me and then leave? What’s going on? I just wanna know.
  10. It shows maturity. A guy who’s direct clearly has a lot of experience with relationships and that’s exactly the kinda guy I want to be with. He’s a good communicator and will let me know what’s going on with him whether it’s good news or bad. He’s someone I can depend on and that’s just the way things should be.
  11. I know it’s scary to be direct but I almost feel like it’s his responsibility. I feel like every time I get direct with a guy, it always ends up scaring him away. For some reason, guys don’t like it when girls make the decisions in relationships, so that’s why I feel like it’s technically their job to communicate. I mean, of course, we should both be as communicative as possible, I just think it feels more natural when a guy does it.
Jennifer is a playwright, dancer, and theatre nerd living in the big city of Toronto, Canada. She studied Creative Writing at Concordia University and works as a lifestyle writer who focuses on Health, B2B, Tech, Psychology, Science, Food Trends and Millennial Life. She's also a coreographer, playwright, and lyricist, with choreography credits for McMaster University’s “Spring Awakening,” “Roxanne” for the Guelph Contemporary Dance Festival, and “The Beaver Den” for The LOT, among others.

You can see more of her work on her Contently page and follow her on Instagram @jenniferenchin.
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