Here’s Why I’m Not Afraid To Live The Rest Of My Life Alone If That’s What It Comes To

The prospect of living life alone is terrifying to a lot of people. Society grooms women in particular to feel like they need a relationship to find happiness and fulfilment. While relationships can bring a lot of happiness, the truth is they just aren’t necessary in order to find fulfilment. You can be happy without one. If you can find someone who enhances your life, that’s great. But if you can’t, it’s better to stay single than commit to someone purely out of the fear of being alone. Here’s why.

  1. An unhappy relationship can ruin a happy life. It’s better to be alone than in a relationship that makes you unhappy. When faced with the choice between the two, staying single is always the best option. Obviously if the opportunity comes up to be in a relationship that enhances your life, that’s great. But don’t be afraid of being alone if it doesn’t. Instead, be afraid of getting stuck in a relationship that doesn’t make you happy. You can find happiness without a partner, just from doing you and leading life the way you want to. A relationship that’s not right can ruin that happiness.
  2. A lot of people are alone in the end. The truth is it doesn’t really matter whether you find a lasting relationship or not. Most people are alone in the end anyway. Whether they are widowed, divorced, or affected by sickness, separation, or family drama, a lot of people spend their last days alone. So getting into a relationship just so you don’t die alone doesn’t really make a lot of sense.
  3. Life is too short to not do it your way. When we were young, life felt like it would go on forever. But as we age, we realize that it’s actually pretty short. And it can be taken away from us in an instant. That’s a scary thought, but also a liberating one. With this in mind, we should commit to living the lives we want to lead. And a relationship can take away our opportunity to do that. Being with someone comes with responsibility, commitment, and sacrifice. It’s better to be alone and do life your way rather than settle down for the sake of it and miss out on the life you secretly want.
  4. Relationships take work. Despite how Disney makes it seem, all relationships take a lot of work. That work might be worth it if the relationship makes you happy, but if it doesn’t? Then there’s not much point. You’re better off staying alone and putting that saved energy into creating the life you want than having a relationship just for the sake of it.
  5. Singledom doesn’t mean loneliness. Choosing not to have a relationship is okay because it’s not the same thing as choosing to be alone. Humans are social creatures and need relationships for their own wellbeing, but those don’t have to be romantic relationships. When you nurture your bonds with family and friends, you’re less likely to feel lonely without a significant other. And you can feel very lonely when you have a romantic relationship if you neglect all your other relationships.
  6. You don’t need a relationship to practice self-care. A relationship just isn’t a requirement for health. You are the only person who can really take care of your physical, mental, spiritual, and emotional needs. While someone else can enhance those and make your life better, you can’t rely on anyone else to do the work for you. So again, a relationship isn’t integral to your survival. It’s okay to live life alone.
  7. The right career is fulfilling. There’s a common misconception that life without a significant other or children is empty. But there are plenty of other sources in life where you can derive fulfillment from. One of the best is the right career. A job that is thankless can be draining, but a career that you love and are passionate about can give you purpose. Rather than putting energy into a relationship that’s not right for you, try finding or creating a career that makes you excited to get out of bed in the morning.
  8. The lack of stress is appealing. Several studies have looked into the overall happiness and health differences between single people and those in relationships. One study has discovered that lifelong single women in their 70s who had no kids were more optimistic and less stressed than married women (both with and without kids). The study also found that single women were also the most highly educated, volunteered more, and were the least likely to be smokers or diagnosed with a major illness. The health benefits (particularly the lack of stress!) are pretty appealing. Although many people may not want to live life alone, it’s not without its benefits.
Vanessa Locampo is an Aussie writer who’s equally obsessed with YA fiction and pasta. Her time is divided between writing all the things, reading all the things, listening to Queen, and bopping her cat on the nose. She has a bachelor’s degree in Creative Writing and has written for sites including and Discovering Montana, and currently works as an editor at Glam. You can keep up with her on Instagram @vanessaellewrites.