It’s Not Your Responsibility To Stop Him From Cheating — It’s His

At some point in your life, you’ll probably find yourself head over heels in love. You’ve got the guy of your dreams and you’ll do anything you can to make sure he’s yours for the long haul. You can say and do all the right things, but there’s still is a chance that your boyfriend’s eyes will stray and he’ll leave you for someone else. What else could you possibly do to keep your boyfriend from cheating? Absolutely nothing.

If you’re in it for the long haul, cheating shouldn’t be on your mind.

Couples in solid, established relationships aren’t consumed by the thought of their relationship ending due to cheating. You should be more interested in planning future vacations and adopting that cute kitten you saw on Facebook. If cheating is at the forefront of your mind, you and your significant other need to make more of an effort to communicate and build up trust.

If you suspect something, just ask.

If you really suspect that your guy might be fooling around behind your back, confront him! Just having that small worry in the back of your mind can drive you absolutely insane if you don’t get it out into the open. Save yourself the stress and get in front of the issue. It may not be your job to keep him from cheating, but you owe it to yourself to say something if you’re not feeling right.

It’s not your job to constantly prove you’re good enough for him to stick around.

You may have shown off a little bit when you first started to pursue this relationship, and that’s okay. Everyone does it. Although he got a taste of your best self in the very beginning, it’s simply not realistic for him to expect you to be totally “on” all the time. A great guy will accept your beautiful, multi-faceted self. It is not your job to be perfect all the time, and your mind shouldn’t jump to his potential infidelity the moment you’re having an off day.

Playing detective is damaging to your relationship.

Even the queen Bey herself has been caught by the paparazzi giving her husband’s phone the side eye. It’s natural to feel a little suspicious of what goes on in your guy’s group chats, but it’s not okay to look. Creeping on someone’s phone is a betrayal of trust. If you want to know who your guy is talking to, just ask him! It shouldn’t be that big of a deal. That being said, if your boyfriend goes out of his way to keep his phone out of your eye line, maybe it’s time to have a deeper conversation.

Grown ass men should have self-control.

You’re his girlfriend, not his babysitter. You shouldn’t feel the need to coddle him into staying faithful to you. He should want to stay faithful to you because he loves you and respects you. If he can’t go a night out without keeping it in his pants, that’s HIS problem, not yours.

You’ll begin to resent him if you take on too much responsibility.

The state of your relationship should be a team effort between you and your significant other. Yes, some days you’ll bear the brunt of responsibility, and so will he. You should never feel as if keeping your guy happy is some sort of full-time job.

You’re his girlfriend, not his entertainment.

Imagine how annoying it would be if you were constantly expected to make all the future plans for your relationship. Your boyfriend’s faithfulness shouldn’t hinge on your ability to keep him amused at all times. You’re not a show pony, you’re his girlfriend. Keeping the relationship fun and interesting is important, but you should feel just as comfortable sitting around and doing nothing with him too!

There’s someone out there that won’t make you feel this way.

A truly solid guy will make you feel comfortable in the relationship without even realizing he’s doing it. Constantly worrying about whether or not your boyfriend is going to leave you is not normal behavior. A good guy will make you feel like you’re his number one.

His willingness to cheat isn’t a reflection of you.

The reality is, people aren’t perfect and at some point in your life, you may get cheated on. If this happens, don’t jump to the conclusion that it was something you did wrong. There are a million reasons why a guy may decide to cheat, and your first instinct should not be that it’s due to something you could have done better within the relationship.

Cheaters don’t deserve loving partners.

If you’re the type of person that believes cheaters don’t deserve a second chance, stick to your guns. Is it likely that a cheater will cheat again? There’s really no way to tell. One thing you can be sure of, however, is that the relationship will never feel quite the same as it did before. Your paranoia may get the best of you and you’ll probably never feel as secure. A guy that’s willing to hurt you and betray your trust like that doesn’t deserve your time and love.

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