While there are plenty of good guys out there who are open to a serious relationship, there are also plenty of guys who are simply looking for a fun one-night stand. There’s nothing wrong with that, but if you want something real, you don’t want to waste your time trying to turn your fling into something more. If that’s the case for you, look out for these signs he’s in it for the short-term.
Things start with a drink.
OK, so this isn’t exactly a golden rule. We’ve all been on first dates that started with a drink and didn’t end in a one-night stand. However, a guy who insists on starting the night with alcohol is at least open to a one-night stand. If nothing else, he wants you to relax and loosen up a little bit because he thinks that’ll help his chances of getting somewhere. If you want to avoid guys who are searching for a hookup and nothing else, suggest afternoon coffee rather than pre-dinner cocktails.
He asks about your place.
If a guy is interested in learning where you live right away, don’t assume he’s a potential stalker. Instead, consider the possibility that he’s looking for a one-night stand. It’s not that he’s not willing to ask you back to his place, but he knows it’ll be easier to leave and never see you again if you go back to your place to fool around. Serial one-night standers will know how to fish for information about where you live long before suggesting the two of you head back there.
He mentions sex outright.
If a guy is looking for a one-night stand, it’s a safe bet that sex is on his mind. It’ll only be a matter of time until he brings it up. It may not even be in a crass way, but he’ll want to bring up sex as a way to get you thinking about it. Pretty clever, huh? A lot of one-night standers will use this tactic when there’s drinking involved. After a couple of cocktails, you might not be thinking straight, so he’ll bring up sex as a way to subtly push you toward sleeping with him.
He doesn’t ask questions, only gives compliments.
I don’t want to make things black and white, but questions from a guy mean he wants to get to know you while compliments mean he just wants to butter you up. Obviously, the latter is a good indication that a guy is only looking for a one-night stand. A guy who wants a one-night stand will want to get you feeling good about yourself, thinking it’ll make you want to go home with him. Of course, everyone wants a guy who compliments them, but just know that compliments sometimes have ulterior motives.
He says he doesn’t like one-night stands.
Spoiler alert, some guys lie to get what they want. I know, crazy, right? If a guy tells you he doesn’t like one-night stands, he might be trying you to let your guard down. You’ll stop worrying about sleeping with him right away and that’s when he puts on the full-court press. After all, he probably brought up the notion of one-night stands, right? Why bring it up if it wasn’t on his mind? That’s one trick to watch from serial one-night standers.
He talks about himself… a lot.
Guys who are just out for sex operate a little differently from the rest of us. They’re always trying to sell themselves to you. It’s like they’re trying to convince you that they’re worthy of sleeping with and that you’re missing out if you don’t take them home. In between complimenting you, a guy will just speak glowingly about himself. Deep down, guys like this think that impressing you is the key to sleeping with you.
He tries to kiss you mid-date.
Guys who are hoping to see you again will usually wait until the end of the night before trying to grab a goodnight kiss. On the flip side, a guy who only wants a one-night stand doesn’t have that kind of patience. Instead, he’ll make his move earlier in the night, almost tricking you into thinking that you’re already on your second date and that it’s OK to go home with him. It’s also his way of testing the waters to see if you might be down with hooking up or not.
It’s late when he gets in touch.
Most of you ladies probably know this already, but it never hurts to have a friendly reminder. No guy texts you after midnight just to talk. If a guy wants to take you on a proper date, he’ll ask you in the morning. But a guy who only wants a one-night stand wants it to happen tonight and he doesn’t care what time it is. That late-night solicitation to “hang out” is nothing more than a one-night stand waiting to happen.
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