An Open Letter To Anyone With A Freshly Broken Heart

An Open Letter To Anyone With A Freshly Broken Heart ©iStock/mapodile

The worst part of a breakup is the devastating feeling that your heart, your visions for the future and your memories have all been shattered in the blink of an eye. While there’s a lot of advice out there about how to effectively move on and get over it, sometimes you just want to know that someone understands. Here’s what I want to say to anyone with a freshly broken heart.

  1. You tried your best. Taking a chance on a relationship is an extremely brave move for anyone. Investing your heart is something you should be extremely proud that you were willing to do without any guarantees it would be forever, because it shows that you still have the ability to feel. Some people are so broken they won’t even dare to try.
  2. Don’t blame yourself. Sometimes stuff just doesn’t work out, and that’s OK. Eventually, something will. This wasn’t the right one, and as hard as it might be to hear that from the people that love you, it really is the truth. You’re your own unique person and your flaws might seem like dealbreakers to some, but to Mr. Right, they’ll be seen as just one more beautiful thing to love.
  3. You have the right to your emotions. You’re allowed to cry. You’re allowed to feel anger. You’re also allowed to eat a ton of pizza and ice cream or burry yourself in a blanket burrito if that’s what it’s going to take to start the process of feeling better. Don’t let anyone tell you that you need to get over it, or that you need to put a smile on your face. You will, eventually, but for now, you’re allowed to let the emotions in and feel what you need to feel.
  4. Mistakes are part of the process. I know it doesn’t feel like it right now, and maybe nothing really makes sense, but mistakes and failures are actually a great thing. You’re human. If you’re not making mistakes and learning lessons, you’re not growing as a person, and in this case, you’re actually just growing into a better person for the right relationship.
  5. You’re one step closer. The journey isn’t over. You know those amazing butterflies you felt in the beginning? The joy you felt in that perfect first kiss? That’s still going to happen again for you, and maybe several more times, until eventually, it’ll be the last time with the right person.
  6. You’re beautiful. You’re a beautiful person inside and out and you need to tell yourself that every day until you believe it. Only the most delicate and beautiful objects can be shattered and the good news is, you’ll not only repair yourself, but you’ll be even more amazing than you were before for surviving the pain.
  7. It’s going to take time. It’s not going to happen overnight and it might not even happen in a week or two. It could take months of dealing with the emotions and riding the waves out until eventually, the tide rolls out and you’re back on dry land. Remember that what you feel now is only temporary and that eventually everything you’re feeling will just be a memory.
  8. You’ll be OK, I promise. Remember your life before he broke your heart? Keep remembering that time. Keep remembering who you were before and I promise you, you’ll find her again. You might be a dishevelled version of her right now, but that’s not who you are permanently. Broken hearts are temporary and a necessary step to find lasting love. In the end, you’ll be OK.