Opinion: Women Maturing Faster Than Men Is Just An Excuse For Men To Be The Worst And It Needs to Die ASAP

Is it me or are you also sick of hearing that women just mature faster than men by nature and that’s why guys act like immature jerks? In my opinion, it’s just an excuse for the opposite sex to be childish AF for far too long because that’s what’s expected of them. The worst part is that we are supposed to believe that they just wake up one day and snap out of it. How about a big old NOPE?

  1. Just because it’s scientifically likely doesn’t mean we have to put up with it. Scientifically speaking, there’s some truth to the notion that men are slower to mature than women. Women’s brains and bodies develop faster and, as a result, we grow up quicker. That being said, we don’t have to put up with it just because it’s science. Science also proved that a gravitational pull exists that basically keeps humans glued to the Earth’s surface but the Wright brothers still invented the airplane, which defies the laws of gravity. Just because science observes or confirms something doesn’t mean that we have to deal. We need to find a way to work around it.
  2. Men use slow maturity as an excuse for doing horrible things in relationships. How many times have you heard a dude say that he cheated on his girlfriend because he’s just not emotionally mature or some similar pathetic reasoning pertaining to his inability to keep his eyes on one woman and his junk in his pants? Insert mega eye roll here! I hope that one doesn’t need emotional maturity to understand why cheating on someone you claim to love is hurtful.
  3. Women accept this BS notion and tolerate dudes doing horrible things in relationships because of it. And how many times have you or your friends justified a man’s horrible actions because you rely on the idea that men are less mature than women? Think about it. Reflect on it and stop tolerating shady behavior from these punks.
  4. Reminder: you’re supposed to be his girlfriend, not his mother. Like many women, I make the mistake sometimes of wanting to take care of my boyfriend to such a degree where I’m caring for him like he’s a child and not an independent man. I think it’s partly my fault but also due to how society thinks women should treat their men. The mark of a good partner shouldn’t be her ability to take care of her guy, it should be her ability to take care of herself and be a loving and thoughtful partner at the same time. Your needs don’t come second to his, and you don’t have to sacrifice it all to show your commitment.
  5. The “boys will be boys” mentality puts undue pressure on women. The notion that men are less mature than women is so pervasive in our society. It puts entirely too much pressure on women. How many times have you heard that the solution to ending catcalling and rape culture is for women to wear less revealing clothes or to be cognizant of our body language so as not to tempt men? How many times have you heard a man blame his girlfriend’s busy career for why he cheated on her? The message this sends is that women are the ones who have to do all of the work to accommodate male immaturity. It’s sexist and it’s unfair and it’s totally disempowering.
  6. The world would be a better place if men just decided to overcome this shortcoming. Just imagine how amazing our world would be if men stopped using this maturity thing as an excuse and committed to just being better citizens, boyfriends, fathers, friends, and people in spite of this inherent maturity shortcoming. Imagine if they started taking accountability and responsibility for their actions instead of blaming it on neurological development. Imagine if we as women demanded it.
  7. Dating an older man doesn’t solve the problem either. FYI, as a woman who’s dated an older man, I promise you that swearing off guys your age isn’t going to solve the problem. In fact, I think that older men who seek out much younger women do so because they don’t want to rise to the level of a badass woman their own age. For the longest time, I wondered why my thirtysomething-year-old boyfriend wasn’t with someone his own age and why he was interested in me. Looking back I realize that it was because he was thirty-something living with a roommate, drinking all of the time, still playing video games and eating Cheerios for dinner. I was doing some of the same things but I was a step out of college, so it made sense for me. I wasn’t ready to grow up yet but I also wasn’t halfway to 35. Just saying!
  8. Men often mature really fast if you make them fight for you. If you’re ever unsure if the man you’re with is capable of ever maturing, give him something to fight for. Now, I’m not saying break up with him, but I am suggesting that you determine your non-negotiables, inform him about them and ask him to rise to the occasion. If he rises up, you might see those maturity issues dissipate pretty quickly.
  9. Expecting maturity isn’t unreasonable. If you’re dating and you’re feeling discouraged, I urge you to remember that expecting a man to be mature isn’t out of bounds or unreasonable. It’s perfectly okay to expect it and if you have to wait a little longer to get what you want, you’ll probably be happier for it anyway even if it doesn’t seem like it now.
Marie is an ambitious millennial woman, leading a corporate life by day and doing her best to live, laugh and love.