If You’ve Ever Felt Physically, Mentally, And Emotionally Exhausted By Dating, Read This

If you’re single and searching for love, you don’t have to watch horror movies because your dating life is one. There are so many reasons that dating sucks but at the top of the list is just how exhausting the whole process is. Here’s why dating is draining AF:

  1. You’re required to overthink everything. You can tell yourself that next time you like someone, you’re going to go with the flow and be totally cool. Yeah, you can tell yourself that… but you won’t be able to actually do it. Dating is full of confusion, from trying to figure out what a guy means when he texts you to hang out this weekend to whether he’s looking for something real. Your mind is always whirling around and you can never stop worrying until you know for sure that you’re a couple.
  2. You never know what’s going to happen. How many times have you sworn that you’ve met your soulmate… and then you never even got a third date? Exactly. Dating is the most mysterious thing ever. There are no crystal balls and no seeing into the future. When you have a crush, he could be the love of your life or another disappointment and the only way to find out is to go for it and hope for the best.
  3. You can never let your guard down. Dating is a delicate balance between being vulnerable enough to get to know someone new and not wanting them to hurt you. If you relax too much, you could come off as a clingy or desperate for a boyfriend even though anyone who thinks that way is totally lame. All you can do is act super confident, even if you don’t feel that way. It’s seriously tiring.
  4. You have to worry about bad behavior. You know how to be polite and make plans and do what you say that you’re going to do. Unfortunately, not everyone shares those traits. Looking for love means taking the chance that you’re going to be insulted, ghosted, and more… and that’s just the first 10 minutes of the first date. Just kidding (kind of).
  5. You compare new guys to your last bad experience. And that’s totally normal. It sucks, but it’s normal. When a new guy mentions that he’s stressed at work, you immediately freak out because the last guy you liked ended things before they even started thanks to his busy work schedule. It’s pretty tiring to always worry even when you have literally nothing to be concerned about. All you have to go by is your experience, and when you’ve had bad luck in love, that really colors everything.
  6. You get different advice from everyone. Your best friend thinks that this guy is the sweetest person ever and your sister is convinced that he’s just trying to charm you. It’s impossible to listen to all of the people in your life and all of their opinions. Every time someone tells you what to do, you get even more baffled.
  7. You know that you can’t settle. It’s actually the worst when you realized that settling isn’t in your vocab. Instead of saying yes to any date or moving forward with any guy, you have to stand your ground and make sure that you’re with the right person. Of course, it’s going to be better in the long run, but for now, it’s draining.
  8. You can see the worst in anyone. The guy that you’re seeing told you that he’s going away next weekend and you’re convinced that he’s going to forget all about you. He makes one silly comment and suddenly you wonder if he’s worth dating. It’s so easy to be negative and see people as a series of flaws. That’s not super fun and it can make you think that you should just give up because there’s no point to even try.
  9. You can’t read someone’s mind. If you could, dating would be the simplest thing in the world. If a guy asked you to grab dinner, you could see into his mind and learn that, yup, he’s got a thing for you. If you made a joke and he laughed, you could find out if he really thought that it was funny or he was just being polite. Having to constantly guess what the other person is thinking couldn’t possibly be more annoying.
  10. You never know who should make a move. Do you gather up your courage and ask this guy out a second time? Do you wait for him to do it? If he doesn’t, does that mean that he hates you? Okay, maybe that sounds kind of dramatic, but dating is a pretty dramatic thing. It’s impossible to know who should make a move and it’s enough to drive you crazy… and it does. Every single time.
Aya Tsintziras is a freelance lifestyle writer and editor from Toronto, Canada. In addition to writing about dating and relationships for Bolde, she also writes about movies, TV, and video games for ScreenRant and GameRant. She has a Political Science degree from the University of Toronto and a Masters of Journalism from Ryerson University. You can find her on Twitter @ayatsintziras and on Instagram @aya.tsintziras.