Just because you and this guy have textual chemistry doesn’t mean it’s always going to be that way. If it changes, does that mean that you’re on your way to a breakup? Not necessarily. Here are 13 possible reasons why his texting behavior is changing.
He’s getting comfortable. When he met you, he had to impress you with romantic texts and regular messages. Now that you’re official, he’s more comfortable and doesn’t feel like his texting can make or break your relationship. Just make sure he’s not getting lazy! He needs to keep putting in effort if he expects things to last between you.
He feels secure. This is different from him being lazy. If he’s secure in the relationship, he probably feels like he doesn’t have to text you every hour. You both feel pretty solid when it comes to how you feel about each other and that’s actually a good thing. As long as you’re on the same page about this, there’s no problem.
He wants some space. That doesn’t mean he wants to break up—he just needs some time to do his own stuff, pursue his hobbies, work, and so on. He doesn’t want to feel like his phone is a ball and chain and he has to text you all the time. A bit of breathing space is a must to prevent things from getting stale.
He’s losing interest. There’s always the chance that if his texting habits have changed a lot, he’s getting bored or losing interest. He might be testing the waters to see how he feels when he doesn’t text you. Does he miss you or not? Meanwhile, you’re waiting for his text and missing him like crazy! It’s so messed up.
He’s fading you out. There’s a guy who doesn’t make much effort anymore, then there’s the guy who is fading you out. How can you tell the difference? By not texting him and seeing what he does. Does he text you or leave things to slowly die? Holding back is the only way to see if he’s still interested or not. It’s hard to do but it’s a must so you know where you stand.
He’s just really busy. Sure, he can’t be so busy that he doesn’t send you a reply to your message all day, but if you know for a fact that his life has become more hectic, as in he got a new demanding position at work, then you can’t go crazy for not hearing from him for a few hours. As long as he still shows he cares and does get back to you instead of leaving you hanging for days, then it’s not a cause for concern.
He’d rather see you. Maybe he doesn’t text you as much as he used to but he still makes plans to see you. If he’d rather see you in person than talk from behind a screen, he’s a keeper. There’s nothing better than real life conversation!
He’s seeing someone else. He might be avoiding you via text because he has someone else on the horizon. It’s really shady—why can’t he just tell you that he wants out of the relationship? Before you confront him, check his other behavior. If he’s never available to see you or he never answers his phone when you call, something’s up.
He has a different texting style. You might not have the same texting style as your boyfriend. He might want to text every two days while you don’t feel right if you don’t hear from him every day. He might use texting just for urgent things and you might want to have fun conversations. It’s important to talk about your texting styles so that you know what’s normal and not normal for him and get your needs met.
He was just after the chase. Some guys love the rush of the chase and then they lose interest once they get into a relationship and that could be this guy’s deal. He’s actually going to contact you less and less if this is the case because he’s a commitment-phobe.
You’ve hit a relationship plateau. Things haven’t progressed from whatever relationship stage you were in and if he’s texting you less than he used to, this could be a sign of how you’ve hit a rut. Instead of progressing to the next phase, you’re stuck in limbo.
He’s backing off. He seemed down for commitment but his lack of texting you could be a sign that he’s actually backtracking. What a coward! When confronted, he might tell you that things have become too serious. In other words, he’s not serious about you.
He’s ghosting you. He might be a real douchebag who stops contacting you from one day to the next. Your messages go unread or unanswered and he never actually tells you what’s going on or why he bolted. It might seem like he wouldn’t do this to you if you’ve been in a relationship for weeks or months, but there are people who would stoop that low. Do yourself a favor and delete the loser’s number before you waste any more of your time on him.
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