Relationships are such a thrill in the beginning. But after the high comes the crash. You get comfortable, too comfortable, and before you know it, you’re knee-deep in boredom. You might not want to admit it (yet), but if these 15 signs hit a little too close to home, it’s time to face the truth.
1. You’ve Got a More Intimate Relationship with Your Phone
Something is up when scrolling through Instagram, mindlessly liking photos, or watching videos becomes more exciting than hanging out or talking with your partner. If you get more buzz from your screen or texting with your friends than talking or interacting with your S.O., it’s a sign that the connection might be wearing thin.
2. Date Nights Feel Like a Chore
Getting dressed up for a night out with your partner at the beginning of your relationship felt like the week’s highlight. Now? You’d rather stay in your sweats and binge-watch a series—preferably alone. If you’re dodging date night or feel like going out is a hassle, it’s worth asking yourself: What happened to the excitement?
3. The Way They Chew Annoys You
Remember when you used to think their little quirks were cute? Now, that snoring, their choice in T.V. shows, even how they breathe (ouch)—is all grinding your gears. If everything they do is suddenly driving you crazy, there’s a good chance that boredom is creeping in, and even the tiniest of things set you off.
4. You Daydream About Other People
It’s normal to find other people attractive, but if your mind keeps wandering to ‘what if’ scenarios with someone else, something deeper is going on. If you’re finding that you’re constantly fantasizing about other people or, worse, thinking about life with someone new, then it could be because you’re looking for that spark your relationship is missing.
5. You Aren’t That Excited to See Them
Remember when you couldn’t wait to hang out with them? Being around them was exhilarating, whether on a night in or a weekend trip. Now, it’s like you’re checking a box. If you’re not excited—or even a little relieved—to see them after a long day, it’s time to admit that things have gotten stale.
6. You’re All About Solo Plans
Suddenly, you’re the solo-plan king or queen. Whether grabbing coffee alone, hitting the gym solo, or spending more nights out with friends, you go solo more often than with your partner. If you’re actively avoiding doing things with your partner, it might be because you’re bored and craving a change of pace. There is nothing wrong with solo plans—until you start making them a way to escape your relationship.
7. You Barely Touch Each Other
Physical intimacy doesn’t always mean sex—it’s those little moments, like holding hands or brushing up against each other, that keep the closeness alive. If you’ve noticed that those small touches have stopped or felt more forced than natural, that’s a sign that the emotional spark might be fading, too.
8. You’ve Stopped Making an Effort
Remember when you surprised them with their favorite snack or left cute notes around the house? Or how you would dress up just to make date night feel special? If you’ve stopped putting in that extra effort because, well, why bother, it’s a big sign you might have one foot out the door.
9. Conversations Are All About Routine Stuff
“What’s for dinner?” “Did you pick up the dry cleaning?” “Don’t forget to take out the trash.” If these are your main conversations, it’s not looking great. Sure, life involves all the boring, mundane stuff, but when all you talk about is the routine, connection, and love may have taken a backseat.
10. You Don’t Care About Their Interests
When you first started dating, you probably bent over backward to learn everything about their hobbies—even if they seemed boring. You went to their favorite band’s concerts, pretended to be interested in their niche sport, or watched that show you weren’t into just to be close to them. Now? You’re not even pretending to care, and it’s a sign that you might be ready to pull away.
11. You’re in a Rut and Don’t Want to Fix It
We all hit rough patches (ever heard of the seven-year itch?), but usually, there’s some effort to get out of the rut. If you know things are off but you can’t find the energy, or worse, the desire to do anything about it, it’s a clear sign of boredom. You’re stuck and not even sure you want to work out to get unstuck.
12. You Fantasize About Single Life
We’ve all wondered what single life would be like now—but it’s one thing to have fleeting thoughts like that; it’s another if you’re daydreaming about it on the regular. You might be missing the freedom, excitement, or possibility of new experiences you’re not getting anymore. When you’re fantasizing more about what’s outside the relationship, it’s probably because you’re no longer satisfied inside it.
13. You Pick Fights for No Reason
Boredom can sometimes lead to unnecessary drama to break up the monotony. Whether it’s getting annoyed by little things or tensions reaching a high, if you find yourself picking at every little thing or blowing up over something trivial, it could be a sign you’re subconsciously trying to shake things up. Arguments become a weird way to feel something—anything—when everything else feels too predictable, and that’s a sign that it might be time to reconsider your relationship.
14. Your Sex Life Feels Like a Checkbox
If your sex life has gone from sexy, spontaneous, and fun to routine and, well, dull, it’s a definite sign the spark has faded. If intimacy is another thing on your to-do list, you may no longer feel attracted to your partner, and the romantic side of the relationship has died.
15. You’re Reading This Listicle Right Now
If you clicked on this article, you already know something’s up. You wouldn’t look for signs of boredom in your relationship unless you started feeling it yourself. And hey, that’s okay. The first step to fixing it is recognising the problem. Now, the question is: what are you going to do about it?
