Following my last major relationship where I was with the guy for four years, I decided to jump on the dating apps bandwagon. I’d never used them before so I was intrigued by what the fuss was all about. As it turns out, they don’t exactly live up to the hype.
I was going through a bad breakup.
I thought dating apps were going to hook me up with hot guys, get me over my ex, and answer all my prayers. In reality, they actually made me feel worse about getting back on to the dating scene.
I carefully selected specific apps.
I went by recommendations of friends and colleagues and signed up to the likes of Tinder, Plenty of Fish, and Happn. I’m not one for one-night stands, so I was more just looking for attention and a few casual dates. I definitely got attention!
I was addicted at first.
There’s something strangely satisfying about matching with potential prospects on a dating app. You get a surge of adrenaline that’s almost addictive when a hottie swipes right on you instead of left. It’s like winning a game every few seconds, and I couldn’t stop playing.
The creepy messages kicked in.
It wasn’t long before guys started sending me creepy messages. A lot of them were super sexual and I’m a bit of a prude, if I’m honest. Call me old-fashioned, but I don’t want a guy to tell me what he wants to do to me before he’s even said hello and offered to take me out on a date. To me, that’s just rude and unnecessary.
I didn’t like how guys would match with me and then ignore me.
Sure, I get that a dating app is like a fun game for some people, but that’s not all it was to me. It used to frustrate me when I’d match with a guy and get excited about him, only for him to never reach out to me.
The ghosters weren’t appreciated.
There were also the guys who would match with me, say hello and start up a conversation, and then disappear off the face of the earth. Seriously, what’s the point in that? You just wasted time for both of us and now I’m back to square one. Sigh.
There was plenty of potential but no follow-through.
There was the odd hopeful that I’d chat to and get on really well with, and we would move the conversation to Snapchat, WhatsApp, or equivalent. It would all seem to be going swimmingly but then I’d always hit some kind of snag.
There were guys who looked nothing like their profile photos.
I decided to vet guys on Snapchat before agreeing to a date with them because I’d heard all sorts of horror stories from other people—and it’s a good job I did. Almost all of them looked nothing like their profile photos. It was false advertising at its finest.
There were guys who said they were tall but were actually short.
As a tall gal, I need a tall guy. Don’t blatantly lie to ladies on your dating profile to get them to chat to you, only to send them a Snapchat of you in the mirror later on down the line resembling the height of an Oompa Loompa. Not cool.
There were guys where nothing materialized.
I’d get excited about certain guys, vet them on Snapchat and approve them (!), and talk to them for hours… but then nothing would happen. Does he like me? Does he want to meet me? Why the heck hasn’t he asked me out already? It was already exhausting and the “fun” had barely begun.
I gave up relatively quickly.
It was only 24 hours before I decided dating apps just weren’t for me. Sure, I was on and off them in a flash so perhaps I didn’t give them a fair chance, but I just didn’t enjoy any of the experiences I had. Bad luck? Maybe. But I just couldn’t justify the waste of time, effort, and energy—I’d rather put it elsewhere.
I like old-school romance.
Dating apps are where chivalry goes to die and it’s just not what I’m all about. I know that they work for some people, but they just didn’t do it for me. It was there and then when I figured out I’d just have to meet guys the old-fashioned way.
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