Remind Yourself Of These 12 Things Whenever You’re Feeling Single & Alone

If you’ve been single for what feels like a lifetime, it can start to seriously get you down. Sure, you may realize that your single status is no big deal, but that logic doesn’t always change the way you feel. When you’re living in a couples’ world, lacking that special someone can make you feel like the odd woman out. Here’s what you need to remember when you’re finding it hard to stay positive:

  1. Your relationship status doesn’t define you. Don’t buy into the BS. Being single or being in a relationship doesn’t have anything to do with how amazing you are or how great your life is or can be. It doesn’t change who you are one damn bit. Only you and your actions define who you are. Don’t let anyone fool you into thinking your singledom makes you less of a person.
  2. No matter how badly you’ve been hurt by them, not all guys are the same. So, you’ve been screwed over by guys in the past? Who hasn’t? If you let that hold you back from finding a great guy that you mesh well with, you’re being just plain ridiculous. Here’s a secret: Not all guys are the same. Yes,  some are jerks, but there’s sure to be a guy out there who’s worth your time.
  3. Settling is foolish and you’re not that desperate. You should never settle for the wrong guy out of sheer desperation. It will only make you unhappy in the long run. You might think that no one will ever love you the way you truly want to be loved, so you try stupidly hard to keep a loser in your life. You’re better than that and you’re definitely not desperate. Don’t go there.
  4.  Chasing the wrong guy will only cause you pain. If you’re having to chase a guy and put in all the effort with him, he’s definitely not The One. When you find a man who’s right for you, you won’t need to chase anymore because he won’t be running anywhere except towards you. It really is that simple.
  5. You absolutely have to put yourself first. Don’t lose sight of your number one priority — yourself! If you’re putting the needs of the guys you meet before your own, that’s seriously messed up. Once you start putting your own needs first, you’ll be more confident and more attractive naturally, without even trying.
  6. Players will never, ever be worth your time. Stop dating these guys. There’s literally never an excuse for letting an immature man-child was your time and energy. If a guy is messing you around and playing games with your emotions, you don’t need to put up with that. Cut him loose before you end up hurt… again.
  7. Things ended with your ex for a reason. Are you still dwelling on how things ended with your ex? If you are, you need a reality check. Things don’t just happen by chance. If it didn’t work out back then, it never will. Stop searching your past for the answers to your future.
  8. Being ‘single’ and being ‘alone’ are not the same. There’s an unwarranted stigma about being single. Some people think that the word is synonymous with being alone, but nothing could be further from the truth. If you have girlfriends and family around you, focus your attention on them, not loser guys.
  9. Men don’t get to decide how worthy you are. Are you really about to give men that much power? Oh, hell no. Men don’t get to decide whether you’re worthy of this world. Having a man’s affection is not your end goal, and nor should it be! Believe you’re worthy and you will be, end of story.
  10. Being single is about being free and having fun. It might sound tired and cliched, but it’s true. When you’re single, you must make the most of it. If you’ve got a case of “the grass is always greener” playing on your mind, you need to change your perspective. Get out there and enjoy your singlehood — once you’re in a relationship, you’ll look back and be sorry you didn’t have more fun.
  11. Love is not a magic cure to life’s problems. Ask yourself this: Why TF are you looking for love anyhow? If you think that finding a man is going to solve all your problems, you’re fooling yourself. Love is a happy bonus, not a magic cure. Happiness comes from within, so it’s up to you to make your own.
  12. Loving yourself will bring you love. Do you really love yourself? Do you value the way you look, act, and think? If the answer is no, you’re the one holding yourself back. It’s a big mistake and even you know it. Don’t take this the wrong way, but until you love yourself, you’ll never find love from a guy.
Charlotte is a freelance writer who's addicted to binge-watching TV, drinking far too much coffee, and writing articles.