Why Romance Is Hotter Than Sex

Why Romance Is Hotter Than Sex ©iStock/svetikd

When it comes to romance, we often think of lovey-dovey things like picnics in the park, red roses left on pillows, and sipping champagne on a beach while watching the sun set. While those are definitely romantic to some and cheesy to others, the fact is that romance can be pretty hot. Don’t believe me? Here are 10 reasons why romance is hotter than sex:

  1. Romance isn’t something you can experience with just anyone. You can have sex with anyone. For example, take every single one-night stand you’ve had – was it fun? Probably. Was it romantic? Um, no. Romance is hot because it’s reserved for only a select few. You don’t pull out all the stops on romance during one night of sexual fun with someone you’re likely to never see again.
  2. It’s doesn’t have an end goal. With sex, there tends to be an end goal: orgasm. While there are those who enjoy the entire adventure along the way, most people still want to make sure there’s an orgasm in there at least somewhere – which is fine, because orgasms are awesome! But romance is hotter because there’s no end goal to it; it can last forever.
  3. It’s intimate on a different level. Yes, sex is intimate, especially with someone you’ve either known for awhile or are in a relationship with, but the intimacy that comes with romance is sexier than the one that comes with sex. It’s playful and honest; it’s not reserved nor is it steeped in hesitation.
  4. It’s more memorable. You may not believe this now, but at the end of your life, you’re more likely to remember the romantic gestures you experienced than all the sex you had. While the great sex will never leave your memory, it’s still the romance you’ve known in your life that will make linger impression forever.
  5. It never ever goes out of style. Is romance dead? Hell no. We just need to make more of an effort to inject it into our daily lives so we can remember just how hot and necessary it is to healthy and happy relationships.
  6. It totally leads to more sex. When you woo someone with romance, you’re basically setting the stage for sex to follow. Of course this isn’t always the case, but the more romantic you and your partner are with each other, the more likely you are to be attracted to your partner, because it shows that you’re both making an effort both in and out of the bedroom.
  7. It gives you butterflies. Although butterflies fade in relationships, keeping your partner on their toes with romance is a surefire way to get those butterflies back. Butterflies are hot, hotter than sex. Besides sex, after awhile, even the best sex, just doesn’t give you butterflies anymore. I know! It’s upsetting! But that’s how life works so deal with it!
  8. When you’re not in the mood for sex, you can still have romance. This is a very true and important fact to imprint on your brain. Even those who love sex, sometimes just aren’t in the mood for it. But what makes romance so hot, is that you’re never NOT in the mood for it.
  9. It takes creativity and effort. When your partner is being romantic, they’re doing two majorly important things: Being creative and making an effort. Granted these two things are often components of sex, too, but romance involves a bit more of each. And how hot is it when your partner totally surprises you with something romantic? Super hot.
  10. It’s actually great foreplay. Because, at the end of the day, sex is still something we all want, then let’s bring it into the party and point out just how great romance is for foreplay. With that in mind, it’s time to get more romance in your relationship. It’s sexy, it’s intimate, and it’s not something that you just dole out to anyone – that’s probably what makes it some much hotter than sex in the first place.
Amanda Chatel is a sexual health, mental health, and wellness journalist with more than a decade of experience. Her work has been featured in Shape, Glamour, SELF, Harper's Bazaar, The Atlantic, Forbes, Elle, Mic, Men's Health and Bustle, where she was a lifestyle writer for seven years. In 2019, The League included Amanda in their "15 Inspirational Feminists Every Single Person Should Follow on Twitter" list.

Amanda has a bachelor's degree in English and master's degree in Creative Writing from the University of New Hampshire. She divides her time between NYC, Paris, and Barcelona.

You can follow her on Instagram @la_chatel or on Twitter @angrychatel.