I’ve started dating this guy and things seemed to be going well, but now the way he’s acting makes me feel like he’s not really into me at all. It actually got so bad that I actually asked him whether he liked me at all. He told me he did but it certainly doesn’t seem like it. What gives?
- I’ve been told to watch what guys do, not what they say. That’s usually how you can tell, right? Well, this guy sure says he’s into me but when it comes to the way he acts, well… Sometimes it feels like he doesn’t even care. I’m definitely getting mixed signals, which is really confusing. Should I take his word for it? Should I look at the way he’s actually acting? Which one is it?
- He never calls me back. Sure, sometimes I call and he picks up the phone and we have an awesome conversation, but sometimes he doesn’t and then he never calls me back himself. I have to chase him. Sometimes I wonder what would happen if I just didn’t. Would he call me himself? Would he just disappear forever? A part of me wants to try, just to find out, but I don’t want to be the one playing games for the sake of it. After all, he’s already told me he likes me, right?
- I’m getting fed up of always being the initiator. Relationships are all about give and take, even when you’ve just started dating, like in this case. Right now, I’m feeling like I’m the only one making the effort to call, arrange dates and even just keep in touch. The only thing I’ve had from him is an answer to my question when I asked whether or not he actually liked me. Well, guess what? Talk is cheap!
- Sometimes I feel like he’s doing me a favor. If he likes me, he should want to meet up with me too. It shouldn’t be just up to me to chase after him. I can’t help but feel like I’m keeping him from doing stuff he actually wants to do by suggesting we meet up. I know it’s silly, but that’s how this whole situation is making me feel right now.
- If you like someone, you’re supposed to show it, right? I mean, I sure like him and I’m showing it. On the other hand, he’s a lot more reserved when it comes to actually making the effort. But why would he tell me he liked me if this wasn’t actually the case?
- Is he playing games? Some guys feel like they need to play it cool to keep women interested. I guess that works. That “hot and cold” thing is definitely keeping me wondering. On the other hand, there’s only so much wondering one can do before going insane. And do I really want to be with someone who plays stupid games like that? High-school is over, dude!
- Is he just keeping me around until something better comes along? It’s easy enough to tell someone you like them and keep them around, but surely if you really like that person, you’d actually act like it too? He doesn’t seem to be very invested in our relationship at all, which makes me wonder whether he’s searching for something better while supposedly dating me.
- Maybe that’s just the way it is. Some people are just not very good at relationships. Let’s face it—maybe this is just what this guy is like when it comes to communicating, dating and keeping in touch with someone he’s supposed to be into? For all I know, he could be thinking that this is a perfectly normal way to behave.
- I’m not sure whether I should just be chill about it. I am definitely unhappy with the situation, but sometimes I wonder whether I’m the problem in this. Is he actually being aloof or am I just reading too much into things because I’m insecure?
- I feel bad about asking all the time. I feel like I need constant reassurance from him because I’m not getting enough positive signals. On the other hand, I don’t want to be that desperate, annoying person who needs to be told she’s liked all the time. As a result, I’m unhappy pretty more than half the time and I keep double-guessing everything he says and does and using it to try and figure out this guy’s true feelings for me.
- Is he even right for me? I’m beginning to think it doesn’t even matter whether or not he likes me. Even if he really does like me, the bottom line is that I am constantly unhappy, because the way he’s acting is making me question the future of our relationship. It might be that I need someone who’s more demonstrative when it comes to relationships—someone who’s going to call back, initiate dates, make the effort and generally act like he actually does care. Words are no longer enough for me, especially when they’re not backed up with action.
