No matter how close and honest you think you and your boyfriend are, I’ve got news for you: he’s keeping secrets from you. I’m not saying that’s a bad thing—we’re all entitled to a little privacy, right? The truth is that you can never know everything about a person, nor do you really want to. Still, don’t be surprised if he’s keeping these things to himself.
- We need alone time. Most of us aren’t going to come out and tell you, but even guys in a happy relationship need alone time. It doesn’t mean that we’re not invested in the relationship. It also doesn’t mean we’re trying to get away from you. The truth is we can’t be in “boyfriend mode” all the time. Sometimes, even if we don’t say it aloud, we’re secretly craving alone time outside of the relationship.
- We need our friends to like you. For a lot of guys, bros before hoes is a real thing. That means it’s important to us that our friends like you and vice versa. We don’t want to force you to like our friends because sometimes they do act like jerks. Still, it is a problem for us when you don’t gel with our social group even if we don’t tell you. It’s also something that could potentially end the relationship because some guys will choose their friends over a girl.
- We get insecure too. Sometimes being a boyfriend means feeling insecure. Once we’re committed to the relationship and start to feel comfortable, most guys get insecure about the relationship ending. We worry that we’re going to lose you to someone else or do something wrong to ruin everything. Remember, it can sometimes take a lot of work to get a guy to settle down. Once we get there, we’re usually happy, but sometimes that happiness comes with insecurity that we’re almost never going to share with our girlfriends.
- We have weird fantasies (that don’t involve you). It’s safe to file this under secrets you probably don’t want to know about your boyfriend. Look, we can’t always control the weird thoughts that pop into our heads, sexual or otherwise. Also, for the record, having weird sexual fantasies doesn’t mean we’re unhappy with the sex in our current relationship. They’re just there and we wouldn’t tell you about them in a million years. Not to sound defensive, but it’s not our fault. Between movies, all of the free porn on the Internet, and Instagram models, it’s impossible for us not to get some crazy ideas in our heads.
- We’re aware of how attractive your friends are. You might think us guys are clueless sometimes, but I assure you we’re not blind. No matter how committed you are to a relationship, you still know what an attractive human being looks like. It’s not that we’re doing this on purpose, per se, but we’ve definitely taken stock of which of your friends are attractive and which aren’t. Yeah, it’s shallow, but that’s how we roll. Also, it’s highly unlikely that we’ll act on our attraction to one of your friends, so don’t worry. We just couldn’t help but notice, that’s all.
- We’ve lied to you. It’s a simple fact of the human existence that everybody lies. You and your boyfriend may have a strong relationship, but I guarantee there have been a few lies sprinkled in along the way. Most of the time, these are just white lies. But if you’ve known a guy for more than a few hours (and in some cases, a few minutes), it’s a safe bet that he’s been less than truthful at some point… or perhaps many points.
- You hurt our feelings that one time. You may not remember it and we never told you, but odds are you’ve seriously hurt your boyfriend’s feelings at some point. You just don’t know because we never mentioned it. Even with our girlfriends, guys aren’t always up for sharing their feelings. We just internalize everything and keep it to ourselves. Obviously, there’s nothing you can do about it if we never tell you, but that doesn’t mean it didn’t happen.
- We hate your makeup. No guy in his right mind is going to tell his girlfriend that he hates the way his girlfriend looks. Also, plenty of guys do like how their girlfriend does their makeup. However, if we don’t like it, you’ll never know. That’s definitely a secret we’ll be keeping from you. It could be just a certain shade of lipstick we don’t like or the few occasions that you overdo the mascara. All I’m saying is that you shouldn’t put on makeup and assume your boyfriend likes it.
- We cry on occasion. Yes, guys cry, but we’re almost never going to do it in front of people. We’re not even going to do it in front of our girlfriends. We’re also not going to tell you it happened. Is that a silly and outdated way to behave? Absolutely. But any occasion that brings us to tears will likely remain a secret. You ladies should know that we’re not emotionless robots. However, that doesn’t mean we’re going to tell you about the times we’ve cried.