Seducing A Man: How To Do It And How Long It Takes

Seduction isn’t just a casual flirtation with your crush. It’s about winning the person over, not just playing a game. A lot of people are so terrified of getting it wrong that they wait for the other person to make the first move. But if you follow these guidelines, you will be more than capable of seducing any man you set your heart on.

1. Lay the groundwork. Seduction starts even before you make your first move. From the beginning, you need to decide what your goals are. Do you want a one-night stand? To make them fall in love? To make them chase you? Knowing your desired outcome will help you tailor your approach. For example, if you want a one-night stand, you should focus on the more sensual ways of drawing a man in–perfume, clothing, and body language. If you want him to fall in love, on the other hand, you should establish from the outset that your mind and personality are just as enticing as your body.
2. Highlight your best assets. When you’re trying to seduce someone, you’ll need to capitalize on your best qualities. These don’t always have to be physical. Sure, cleavage and lipstick work wonders on the straight male brain, but so do intelligence and humor. Whatever your greatest charms may be, now is the time to exploit them. Identifying what makes you attractive will also remind you why you’re such a catch, and give you the confidence to pursue your crush without self-doubt.
3. Use eye contact. Eye contact is one of the most effortless and effective starting points for seduction. From infancy, humans are hardwired to respond positively to eye contact, which we instinctively understand as a tool of meaningful communication. As adults, we use eye contact to convey sincerity, attention, and, most importantly for romance, desire. Eye contact has been shown to produce mutual sexual arousal. If you’re hoping to seduce someone, holding their gaze is a powerful place to start.
4. Be strategic with body language. We are constantly betraying our thoughts through involuntary physical cues–fidgeting when we’re nervous, averting our gaze when we’re lying, and blushing when we’re embarrassed. But you can also use body language intentionally to your advantage. Lip-biting, for example, is highly erotic because it brings attention to one of the most sensual parts of your body. Leaning toward him and using open body language to signify attention and self-assurance are also ways to build chemistry with him without him realizing it.
5. Smile (sorry). Look, I highly recommend telling a stranger to f– off if he gives you the unsolicited advice to smile, but it turns out they do it for a reason. Studies have found that men are biologically programmed to find smiling women attractive. Surprisingly, the opposite is true of women finding men attractive. This is because smiling is associated with the “feminine” characteristics of submission and openness, while a serious expression is associated with power and masculinity. This information may make you feel more like scowling than smiling, but if you want to be strategic about seducing a man, smiling is one of your best tools.
6. Get his number. You might think that seduction is all about in-person interaction, but it doesn’t have to be. Body language and appearance play a major role in building attraction, but you can be just as alluring through text if that’s where your sex appeal shines. Getting a guy’s number is easier said than done, but if you follow the steps up to this point, he might give it to you without being asked. If you feel more comfortable with words than physical seduction, send him some spicy texts that make him regret not being with you in person.
7. Be patient. Most of us are not masters of seduction. It will take plenty of practice before you’ll feel natural and in control. And even when you do everything right, it can take time. There are times when you’ll see someone across a room and be able to seduce them within ten minutes, but often, it can take weeks if not months for the person to start noticing your appeal. Don’t make the mistake of doing more when you’re not succeeding. Think about your own experience of guys who are overly pushy or needy. It’s a big turn-off. Patience is key.
8. Give him something to think about. Seduction doesn’t always work right away. You can’t expect a guy to fall hard for you after a few minutes of eye contact and witty banter. If you want to get him well and truly tangled in your web of sexual magnetism, you need to play the long game. Leave him with an impression that he won’t be able to forget. Whether it’s a conversation that he can’t get out of his head, the way your outfit clings to your body in all the right places, or a compliment you give him, taking up real estate in his mind will ensure that his interest multiplies even without you there.
9. Play hard to get. One of the risks of setting out to seduce a man is that you’ll go in too hot to handle. This is especially true if you have to work up the nerve to do it. You can get so keyed up that you end up coming on too strong, overwhelming him, or even making it seem like you’re not into him. So one of the essential stages of seduction is to withdraw. Once you’ve used all the other tricks to draw him in, leave him hanging. He’ll fall over himself trying to win your attention again.

How To Build Up Your Confidence In Seducing A Man

It’s easy to strategize how you’re going to seduce someone, but not everyone is born with effortless confidence to put themselves out there. Here are some tips to get yourself in the right mindset if you struggle with assertiveness:

1. Have a mantra. Everyone deserves love and contentment, so why are we always talking down to ourselves? Many of us are used to looking in the mirror and feeling ugly, chastising ourselves after something we say to a crush, or bullying ourselves internally for a perceived failure at work. This is terrible for your mental health. One of the best ways to break the habit of negativity is to create a mantra. Whenever you feel weak or inadequate, say to yourself, “I am enough,” or “I am powerful,” over and over again until you believe it. It may feel strange at first, but it actually works.
2. Stop comparing yourself to other people. It is inevitable to analyze how you stack up against those around you. But whether you’re looking at photoshopped images of influencers on social media or the kickass career of a friend, comparing yourself is toxic for your self-esteem. Studies show that envy has a direct and negative impact on self-image. When you set out to seduce someone, comparing yourself to other women will destroy your confidence.
3. Wear what you feel comfortable in. Seducing someone requires the right outfit, but that doesn’t mean it has to be the sexiest ensemble in your wardrobe. Wearing what you feel comfortable in will compensate for whatever attributes you’re hiding in the process. No amount of cleavage can outdo the confidence that emanates from a person who feels comfortable in their own skin. Wear what makes you feel sexy and self-assured, and you will be irresistible.
4. Strike a power pose. According to a 2o12 study, people can give their confidence an immediate boost by standing alone in a power pose for two minutes. You can literally just do it in a bathroom stall before heading into a bar to flirt with your crush. Think of the Wonder Woman (or Beyoncé) posture: legs planted far apart, hands on hips, shoulders back, chest forward. The study suggests that doing this creates a sense of power, increases the dominance hormone, testosterone, and lowers the stress hormone, cortisol.