Should You Ditch A Guy Who Doesn’t Take You Out?

Sometimes casual flings are more centered around sex than anything else, but if you’re hanging out with a guy for more than five minutes, you should probably be expecting him to hang out with you in the daylight hours, as well. You know, like on dates and stuff. Here are some reasons why you should totally ditch a guy who doesn’t take you out.

  1. You deserve to be taken out. Go dutch if you must, but however it happens, you should be dating someone who’s willing to spend some of their time with you in public.
  2. Planning shows commitment. People who can’t seem to make plans further in advance than picking up the phone to make booty calls are not the most committed of creatures.
  3. You have get to know each other time. Even if it’s just a fling, don’t you want to know if you can trust him or even stand being around him outside of the bedroom? What happens when you run into him at a party, realize that you basically hate him, and then that you just wasted a lot of time?
  4. He’s probably taking someone else out. It’s true. And you really don’t want to find out about that in awkward circumstances (or when you’re PMSing).
  5. It’s more emotional than you think. You’re not a robot. Feeling bored, confused, and irritated can happen pretty easily with a guy who’s keeping your relationship in the closet.
  6. You’re lying if you say you don’t miss it. Is there really a girl in the world who doesn’t like to be wined and dined? Not many.
  7. His pushing you away is actually keeping you in limbo. On some level, he’s basically trying to show you that this is not going anywhere, but that bad boy behavior is exactly what keeps you guessing and interested.
  8. It’s all on his terms. Let’s be honest, you’d paint a slightly different picture for this coupling if you could, but you’re simply afraid to lose him if you demand too much. And you might, because…
  9. He’s just not serious about you. We all want different things, but do we really need to invest our precious time in people that aren’t investing in us? People who care aren’t going to be perfect but they will try to avoid losing you.
  10. He’s basically hiding you from the world. Call it what you want, but a guy who isn’t taking you out is keeping you quiet.
  11. You’re a convenience, not a priority. You’re like the daytime television he’ll let play in the background and not even the stuff he’s DVRing for a better time.
  12. It makes it more complicated to accept dates from other people. You guys are not officially together or on the road towards being together, but where does that leave your openness with other dudes?
  13. When you do meet someone else, you still have to breakup with this guy. No matter what type of relationship it is, the longer it goes on the more complicated the breakup can be. And yes it’s still a breakup even though you weren’t together to begin with.
Kate Ferguson is a Los Angeles local and freelance writer for a variety of blog and magazine genres. When she's not writing, the UC Davis graduate is focused on pursuits of the entertainment industry, spin class, and hot sauce. Look for article links, updates, (and the occasional joke) on Twitter @KateFerg or @WriterKateFerg, or check out her personal blog