If you’ve been hurt before, it can be difficult to open up and let someone new into your life. After all, you don’t want the same old trash that you’ve had to dig through before. But what if this new guy is different? Maybe he’s one of the good guys who treats you right and makes you feel special. In that case, taking that leap could be totally worth the potential of getting hurt. Before you give him your heart though, make sure he’s actually worth it by looking out for these signs.
- He’s excited to get to know you. It’s one thing to ask getting-to-know-you questions because it’s one of those expected formalities when you first meet, but you should only stick with a guy who’s actually interested in the answers. If he’s thinking of just sex, cage that heart away. If he likes you for both your sexiness and your inner workings, then he could be a keeper.
- He doesn’t leave you on read. You know the saying: If he really liked you, he’d find time for you. Of course, you shouldn’t expect him to text back within minutes when he’s at work, but if he leaves you on read for days at a time, he’s clearly not making you a priority. In that case, don’t make him your priority either. In fact, you might want to cut him off entirely. Never settle for a guy who only has lukewarm feelings for you.
- He makes you feel incredibly comfortable. You’re never on edge around him. You don’t feel like you’re being judged or disliked in any way. When you’re with him, you feel nothing but comfort and stability. Remember: you deserve only the best. There’s something special about sitting with someone and feeling contentment, love, and respect.
- He likes your friends. Invite your guy to meet your friends. If he’s a keeper, he’ll not only like your friends but encourage you to hang out with them. Guys who gripe whenever you talk about your friends are showing major red flags for early signs of emotional abuse. Conversely, you should also be able to hang out with his friends.
- His eyes light up when he sees you. You want to be with a guy who’s excited to see you, right? The best guys will keep that light in their eyes even as that super fun honeymoon phase starts to wear off. Before you give your heart away, really evaluate how he reacts when you get together. Some guys will continue to see women they don’t really like because they’re too cowardly to break it off. If he’s one of those, break it off for him.
- He doesn’t just use you for sex. There’s nothing wrong with a friends with benefits scenario as long as you know what you’re in for. If the guy just wants to keep in casual, he’s the wrong one to keep for the long haul or hope for a future with. Protect your heart from the FWB guys because they’re not the ones you’re going to end up with.
- He shares his feelings. Open communication is one of the most important things in a relationship. There’s an inclination for women to excuse a man’s closed-off feelings because “he just doesn’t like to open up.” While you may be fine dealing with that in the beginning, it’ll likely cause problems later on. If he’s not willing to share with you how he feels, this could be an insurmountable problem.
- He’s willing to compromise. It’s not “his way or the highway.” If so, this is another red flag. You’ll want a guy who’s willing to work together when you hit a relationship roadblock. A good relationship is a partnership where both of you put in equal work to make the other happy. Don’t settle for anything less.
- He introduces you honestly. When he introduces you to people, what language does he use? And does it change based on who he’s talking to? Referring to you as “my friend” when you’ve been dating for months means that he doesn’t see you the way you want to be seen. But if he excitedly says, “This is the girl I’ve been seeing!” then you’ve gotten a winner. And if it’s been months and you still haven’t met anyone in his life, get out of there. This guy is full of crap.
- He’s willing to give you his heart as well. Is he actually reciprocating your feelings? Nothing feels as amazing as a guy who’s as into you as you are into him. The decision to give him your heart isn’t solely for you. Have a discussion with him to make sure he’s on the same page. If he is, you have nothing but great times ahead.
