10 Signs You’re Nothing But A Casual Encounter To Him

10 Signs You’re Nothing But A Casual Encounter To Him ©iStock/franckreporter

Casual encounters are great, as long as the casual approach goes both ways. So what if you want more? What if you don’t want to be just some random? How do you know if a man really cares about you or only cares about your body? If you can relate to any of the following, chances are he doesn’t see you as anything more than guaranteed intimacy.

  1. You never go out in public together. And there’s a reason for it — you’re not his girlfriend. He’s not going to take you on a date because he doesn’t want to date you. You’re just his little secret and you’ll never be anything more.
  2. He clearly has no plans to commit. He’s expressed that he’s not ready for commitment or maybe even that he’s not “relationship material,” but for some reason you haven’t taken the hint. Well, it’s time for you to get a clue, because this guy will never be your boyfriend, and you will never be anything more than just his casual hookup buddy.
  3. He doesn’t care about what’s going on in your life. If this guy can’t even fake caring about what’s going on in your life, then he’s clearly not interested in being a big part of it. The only thing he wants to talk about is love-making because sadly that’s all you are to him.
  4. He doesn’t know how to communicate. Not his feelings or really anything else other than what time you two are hooking up. Just like he doesn’t want to hear the intimate details of your life, he isn’t going to share anything about his. He’ll never be vulnerable, and never share his emotions, because he doesn’t have any for you.
  5. He never gives direct eye contact… Because he’s always staring at your chest. It’s great that he appreciates what God gave you, but if he can’t appreciate your mind, then it’s pretty obvious he’s only into your body.
  6. He never refers to you as anything more than a friend. Sure, maybe he calls you “baby girl” when you’re in his bed, but he’s pretty careful about never calling you his girlfriend. So if he won’t even give you that special label in private, do you really think he’s doing it in public? Bottom line — if you’re not together, then he’s single and sadly so are you.
  7. He only compliments you on your looks. You’re too busy letting your heart skip a beat over his compliment to realize that he only ever cares about your appearance. He never admires your mind or your personality because frankly, he doesn’t know you. Actually, he doesn’t even care to know you because he doesn’t want to fall in love, he just wants another body to keep him warm at night.
  8. You’re always a last minute plan. The only time you get together is to sleep together. He doesn’t have to plan anything because you’re a last-minute deal. When he’s bored or in the mood, he knows you’ll be more than eager to give him what he needs. Face it, you never have a date — it’s always just a casual encounter.
  9. You never spend the night. Girlfriends sleep over. Casual encounters only stay until the deed is done. If you don’t want to sleep together then he doesn’t want to hang out. No matter what excuse he’s given, you’re only welcome in his bed for one thing and one thing only.
  10. The only satisfaction he cares about is his own. If he doesn’t care about you, then he doesn’t care about your satisfaction. Boyfriends love to please you, but casual dudes only want to please themselves. You’ll never be his girl because at the end of the night he’s just using you.
Kelsey Dykstra is a freelance writer based in Huntington Beach, CA. She has a bachelor’s degree in Creative Writing from Grand Valley State University and been writing professionally since graduating in 2013. In addition to writing about love and relationships for Bolde and lifestyle topics for Love to Know, she also writes about payment security and small business solutions for PaymentCloud.

Originally from Michigan, this warm weather seeker relocated to the OC just last summer. Kelsey enjoys writing her own fictional pieces, reading a variety of young adult novels, binging on Netflix, and of course soaking up the sun.

You can find more about Kelsey on her LinkedIn profile or on Twitter @dykstrakelsey.
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