There Are So Many More Important Things To Find Than A Future Husband

When you’re single and searching, it’s easy to get discouraged by all the mushy Snapchats your coupled friends post and wonder how much better your life would be if you too found your guy. While it’s perfectly fine to want someone special, making it your focus will only break your own heart. Instead, spend your time searching for the hundred million billion other awesome things that will make the most of your single life, including but certainly not limited to these 10:

  1. A  job you actually like. Nothing will suck the life out of you more than working a job solely for the paycheck. Instead of waiting for a man to come along to save you from your 9-5 hell hole, go ahead and make a plan to save yourself. Put some time into figuring out how you can use your most natural skills in a way that makes you happy and make you some money. Even if you still have to work that lame gig for a little longer, having a goal you’re working towards will make it more meaningful.
  2. A kickass lady squad that supports you. Friends are forever and boys are just whatever, right? Fill your calendar up with dates with your best gal pals and work on being a better friend. Or, if you feel like your current friend group is dragging you down, make it your mission to find some new ladies who will lift you up.
  3. The means to travel frequently. Make a bucket list of all the places you want to go in the next year, and how much it will realistically cost to do them. Even if it’s just a weekend trip to a place that’s two hours away, getting a chance in scenery can make a huge difference.
  4. A closer connection with your family. Even though sometimes we might like to, you can’t change your family, so figure out how you can best get along with them and then actually make an effort to spend time with them. Have a weekly dinner and rotate houses if they’re close enough or a weekly Skype date if they’re a few states away. It doesn’t take a lot to make the people who are special to you actually feel special.
  5. A financial plan that allows for frequent treat yo’self days. It’s time to get your budget on. Get advice from someone who does finances for a living or try one of those free budgeting apps. Take your time to find a plan that will work for your current lifestyle and make it, so you don’t have to wait for a boyfriend to buy you presents.
  6. The courage to tackle a big fear. If there’s one thing that you’ve always wanted to do but have been too afraid to attempt, now’s the time to tackle it. Nothing will make you feel more secure and fulfilled than crushing a big goal.
  7. A form of exercise that makes you feel sexy and powerful. Working out only sucks if you don’t like the workout routine your using. So try everything, literally every form of exercise there is until you find something you not only like but that makes you feel like Wonder Woman after you do it. After that, being healthy will never be a chore.
  8. Your voice. It’s easy to let people talk over us and for us. Make it a point to be consciously aware of how much you’re speaking for yourself in your own life. Stop saying “yes” when you want to say “no.” Start putting yourself first and telling people how you really feel. Your voice has a big impact on your life and happiness, whether you use it or not.
  9. The freedom to wear/do/say/be whatever you want. It’s time to quit basing all the things you do on other people. Be it your friends, family or a potential boyfriend, the only opinion that matters when it comes to the clothes you wear and how you spend your time, is yours. Labels are for soup cans (yes, I stole that from an icon on I had once on my AIM profile), so make sure the life you’re living is one that you actually want.
  10. The ability to not take life so seriously. People who focus on “finding someone” are doing so because they’re trying to create this perfect Instagram life that they think will make them happy. Real life is messy and weird and magical, and the more you accept that you really can’t control it, the better off you’ll be.
Emily is a writer, dog mom, and occasional narcissist living in what her mom refers to as “a bubble.” Geographically speaking, it’s more like Daytona Beach, Florida. A graduate of the University of Central Florida, she is a community editor for a local newspaper and spends most of her time trying to convince her dog to cuddle.