Stop Saying You’re “Forever Alone”

I get it — you’ve been single a long time and it’s starting to feel like you’re never going to find someone. You’re set in your ways and dating is becoming increasingly infuriating as you get older. Being alone almost seems like the easier option — at least that’s what you tell yourself when you start to feel like you have no control over your relationship status whatsoever. But none of that means you’re “forever alone,” so you should probably stop saying it.

  1. It’s just not true. First of all, there are billions of people in the world, so chances are, you’ll end up dating at least one of them at some point. Second, forever is a pretty long time, so what makes you think that being alone for a few years means you’ll actually truly be alone until the end of time?
  2. It’s just another way of putting yourself down. Saying you’re forever alone kind of implies that no one will ever want to date you. Either that or you’re just extremely picky. Why say negative things about yourself at all? At best, they are just empty words; at worst, they’re actually holding you back from finding someone awesome.
  3. Being single isn’t the same as being alone. You might not have a romantic partner, but does that mean you’re alone? Of course not. You still have your friends, family, acquaintances and colleagues. If you want a close bond with someone, you can have that with someone other than a boyfriend — but you still have to work for it.
  4. It just makes you sound pathetic. It’s not like everyone you know is out there feeling sorry for you for being so utterly and embarrassingly single. If all you do is draw attention to your relationship status all the time, that’s all anyone is going to think about when it comes to you. Don’t be the pathetic single girl — but the single girl who doesn’t need to be in love to live life exactly how she wants to live it.
  5. Being alone isn’t that bad. There are worse things in the world than being single. Some people actually choose to be alone and they’re perfectly happy. The way you’re whining about it and putting yourself down makes it seem like being alone — forever or not — is a bad thing and that doesn’t have to be the case. It’s all in your attitude.
  6. It could be a self-fulfilling prophecy. Maybe your bad attitude is actually the thing that’s holding you back from finding love. You keep saying you’re never going to find someone, so is it really a surprise that you haven’t yet? There’s nothing to lose by having a little faith that things will work out, so why not ditch the negativity and see what happens?
  7. It’s kind of cliche. “Forever alone” is one of those meme-ready phrases that people joke about and overuse. You’ve had a string of bad dates, it’s must be because you’re doomed to be alone forever. You embarrassed yourself in front of a guy you like, it’s because you’re terrible at dating. Your love life shouldn’t be a cliche, so stop calling it one.
  8. You don’t know what the future will bring. Maybe you’ve never had a boyfriend up until now, but the past doesn’t dictate the future. You never know what could happen one hour from now, next week or a year in the future. Pretty sure you aren’t psychic, so the word forever is just speculation.
  9. It’s better to be alone than with the wrong person, anyway. Being alone isn’t the automatic worst relationship status. Sometimes “it’s complicated” is a million times worse. Or being smack dab in the middle of a horrible breakup. Don’t assume everything will get better once you’re in a relationship because, if you’re interested, there are plenty of people out there that will tell you horror stories to make you thankful for your single status.
  10. Things can change pretty quickly. Your “forever alone” status could end tomorrow, for all you know. There’s no set amount of time you have to be single in order to be worthy of finding love. We’re all on different paths and it’s not worth it to compare your love life to someone else’s. You can be jealous of people who have always been in a relationship all you want, but they’ve been through their fair share of relationship BS that you’ll never have to experience. The grass isn’t always greener.
By day, Courtney is a digital marketing copywriter living in Toronto, Canada. By night, she's a freelance lifestyle writer who, in addition to, contributes regularly to, IN Magazine, and SheBlogs Canada. Want to chat about relationships, Stephen King or your favorite true crime podcast/documentary/book? She's on Twitter @courtooo.