I’m Strong & Intelligent Until I Fall In Love—Then I Get Stupid

I’d like to think I’m a smart woman. I’m strong, independent, and totally self-sufficient, but somehow all that goes out the window when romance comes knocking. There’s really no other way to say it—romance makes me stupid.

I feel powerless to stop it. Trust me, I’ve tried not letting it affect me. I’ve found myself lying awake at night trying NOT to think of the way that cute guy kept catching my eye and giving me that dimpled smile of his one too many times, but it never ever works. Give me a subtle wink, a brush of the hand, a little bit of romance and I’m done. What’s wrong with me?

Chivalry has me swooning. I blame the 21st century for its lack of men who hold the door open and give you their jacket when it rains. Seriously, where are all those gentlemen? When one of those rare specimens comes my way, I’m a goner and I fall for him pretty much instantaneously.

Even small romantic acts leave me reeling. Whether it’s the classic red rose or a weed’s excuse for a daisy that he picked for me as we were strolling down the street, that doesn’t matter. A little bit of romance goes a long way in capturing my attention (and my heart). I’m not sure if it’s because most guys aren’t romantic or if I’m just a total sap.

I start planning ahead. This one’s scary and I absolutely hate doing it, but I do it anyway. In my head, I can already see us two, three, even 20 years from now. All he did was play me a song on his guitar and I can picture us in our house with two kids and a dog. I realize how insane that sounds but that doesn’t stop it from happening.

Rationality becomes overrated. I’m generally smart and sensible but give me a guy with genuine charm and competence in the dating department and I’m pretty much ready to hand over my heart immediately, no questions ask. Only much later does rational thought kick in and remind me that he might not be so great after all.

I overthink to the max. I overthink at the best of times, but when the guy is romantic, I’m about 1,000 times worse. The guy doesn’t realize it but I’m going to be replaying that one beautiful thing he said over and over in this jumbled up mind of mine.  I’ll dissect beautiful romantic acts trying to find exactly what he meant and why instead of taking things at face value.

I believe all the beautiful words. I’m a sucker for beautiful words even though I know they’re meaningless without actions to back them up. I think I have a bit of a poet’s soul so a guy who knows all the right words wins serious brownie points with me.

I make up his excuses for him. I have this bad habit of mistaking a romantic guy for a genuine guy, so when he doesn’t message or doesn’t call, I’m already thinking of all the plausible explanations in my mind. When it feels like he’s being distant, it must be because he’s under pressure or unwell. If he’s romantic, it’s hard for me to find fault, it’s hard for me to spot the red flags. If he’s romantic, all I see is green for go and I’m running full steam ahead… often to my own detriment.

I become a damsel in distress. I’m not particularly proud of this one, but it happens. The romantic guy becomes the one I seek out, the one I want to find ANY excuse to spend time with. Where I’ve never needed help with painting my house or putting on my earrings or walking fast in heels, I’m going to ask for his. Something about a man coming to my rescue is sexy—and yes, I’m aware of how bad that sounds.

The rose colored glasses get put on and rarely come off. Tell me I look beautiful in a different language, brush a strand of messy hair from my face—it doesn’t take much for these rose colored glasses of mine to come on, and when they do, it’s hard for me to see sense afterward. The world is beautiful and he is perfect and we’re going to live in this romantic bliss forever! Then, of course, something happens and the illusion is gone and I wonder how I missed all the obvious signs of disaster.

I never learn. Smart people learn from their mistakes and I do too, generally… but not when it comes to matters of the heart. The romance has me fooled every time. I go in there expecting the romance to be for real this time and while I often end up disappointed, I’m often honest, I like it that way. I’m pretty smart but everyone has to have something that makes them stupid, that keeps them foolish and young. Romance seems as good an excuse as any!

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