The Struggles Of Dating When You’re Awkward AF

You’ve always been the awkward girl, and that makes dating even harder than it already is. It’s not that you’re not smart, funny and a total catch, it’s just that you don’t know how to channel all of that into your interactions with guys… and that makes things challenging, to say the least.

  1. You don’t know how to flirt. It’s not that you just haven’t had enough practice, it’s that all the practice in the world couldn’t help your awkward ass smooth talk a guy. You dream up conversations in your head, but when the time comes to actually have a real life conversation, you wish you could just run and hide.
  2. You can’t tell when he’s flirting. You know how awkward you are, so you kind of wonder why anyone would want to date someone like you. Because of this, you automatically assume that every guy just wants to be your friend, so when a guy is actually putting the moves on you, you need one of your girlfriends to tell you that it’s real.
  3. You’re clumsy AF. That means that things like heels will always make you stumble, and being the center of attention will never leave you in a flattering light. It makes you a little insecure, but you just can’t help but be yourself. You might be used to your awkward self, but you know others aren’t as comfortable, so when the situation gets tense and all eyes are on you, you might just take off running — literally.
  4. You never say the right thing. Even when you’re not flirting, words just seem to stumble out of your mouth. The more you stumble, the more anxious you get, which causes you to ramble even more, resulting in some serious word vomit. Even small talk is stressful, because no matter what the situation, the awkward girl is always under pressure.
  5. You have no idea whether or not he actually likes you. Social interactions are just plain awkward for you, so you’re not exactly the best at picking up on social cues. Regardless of how many signals he’s sending, you’re just not getting the message. You wish you could get a clue, but sadly, unless he outright tells you how he feels, then your love life (or lack thereof) is a complete mystery.
  6. You obsess over every interaction. You know the girl who reads way too much into what a guy says? Yeah, she’s got nothing on the awkward girl. First you obsess over the fact that you totally don’t have a crush and then you spend the rest of the night analyzing your non-crush’s every word. It’s a never-ending cycle and you just wish you could break free.
  7. You’re not just awkward socially, but physically too. When he hugs you, you’re not really sure what to do next. Do you pat his back? Rub your arm up and down? You spend the entire time wondering if you’re doing it right or if he’s noticing how unnatural you are, and that’s just hugging. Kisses always make you lean the wrong way, bump heads and end up injured instead of turned on. Seriously, you should wear a warning tag.
  8. You can’t ever keep your cool. When it comes to cool, you’re anything but. You don’t wait an appropriate amount of time to text back and you could never hide your overwhelming infatuation. No one has ever accused you of playing mind games, because frankly you just wouldn’t know how.
  9. You’re looking for a very unique guy. You’re a one of a kind girl yourself, therefore you need a guy who loves you because of all your quirks, not despite them. You need a guy who doesn’t give up when you avoid him because he knows you just can’t face your feelings — a guy who chases you when you flee and finds the fact that you can’t play it cool charming. As an awkward girl, what you really need is one exceptional and understanding badass guy.
Kelsey Dykstra is a freelance writer based in Huntington Beach, CA. She has a bachelor’s degree in Creative Writing from Grand Valley State University and been writing professionally since graduating in 2013. In addition to writing about love and relationships for Bolde and lifestyle topics for Love to Know, she also writes about payment security and small business solutions for PaymentCloud.

Originally from Michigan, this warm weather seeker relocated to the OC just last summer. Kelsey enjoys writing her own fictional pieces, reading a variety of young adult novels, binging on Netflix, and of course soaking up the sun.

You can find more about Kelsey on her LinkedIn profile or on Twitter @dykstrakelsey.