The Struggles Of Being A Perpetually Horny Woman

Constantly being in the mood is expected of guys, but it’s a lot harder to be a perpetually horny woman. Unfortunately, our society is permeated with unfair judgments about women who have a high sex drive, and those judgments affect us more often than you would think. Here are some of the struggles we face.

We know we’re “supposed” to make a guy wait to test his commitment, but we have a hard time waiting ourselves. Sex is an important part of a relationship, and it’s usually awkward at first. As soon as we’re dating someone new that we actually like, we can’t help that our minds automatically start thinking about sex. In many cases, we’re not capable of holding out long enough to make any kind of impression on a guy because we want it too. Being a horny woman is hard.

When we get into a relationship with someone who doesn’t want sex as often as we do, we wonder what’s wrong with us. It’s a common misconception that men always want sex, while we’re innocent little flowers who only do it for his pleasure. I shouldn’t need to tell you that’s BS, but just in case you weren’t aware, it is. It sucks when you like everything about a guy, but he’s not rising to the occasion as often as you’d like and or isn’t as enthusiastic. Our society’s been permeated with this double standard for so long, however, that we actually start to doubt our own normalcy

We live in a world of so much slut-shaming. Actually, in churches, it’s called counseling, but it’s the same thing. It’s great that waiting for marriage worked for you, but not all of us want that kind of life. We know that the desire is perfectly normal, an instinctual urge similar to getting hungry or thirsty. Stop judging; just live and let live.

Work is not the time or place for random fantasies, but they happen anyway. Nope, not even we innocent flowers are free from random fantasies. Unlike guys, our struggle isn’t physically evident, but that doesn’t make it less annoying or distracting. It tends to become more common the longer we go without getting any action, so it’s a problem that can be easily solved for people in relationships, but a bit more complicated for single folks.

The disappointment is real when you give a guy a chance but he fails to please you. We’re really not trying to be impossible to please, but we don’t get to choose what pleases us any more than you do. If we give a guy the time of day and he fails to get us to the final destination, we still have to get off because that’s just how it works – so we end up having to take matters into our own hands, so to speak.

The frustration builds when you’re single, busy, and it’s hard to get alone time. Whether you have roommates constantly around, house guests that overstay their welcome, or you just have such a busy schedule that you pass out as soon as you get home, it sucks when you’re not having as much “me time” as you need. People mean well, but sometimes we need to disconnect from them and meet our own needs with no distractions. Being a horny woman ain’t easy, that’s for sure.

We’re justifiably pissed off when guys think we’re not serious girlfriend material because we didn’t play the waiting game. Guys, come on now. It’s 2022, and being a prude is no longer highly regarded as an admirable trait, nor does it say anything about our moral fiber. You should be glad we’re down for some (safe) fun, but still, get to know us and respect us as much as any other woman.

The never-ending eye roll when our friends complain about their boyfriends/husbands trying to get it in every night is a lot. I’m sorry, but that doesn’t sound like a terrible problem to have, supposing you actually like your significant other. If you’re repulsed by him, you shouldn’t be with him anyway. If it’s just a really stressful time when you’re not in the mood, maybe a mood booster is just what you need. Either way, that complaint sounds ridiculous to us because you can never be too rich, too beautiful, or have too many orgasms. It’s just not possible.

Our partners are suspicious of our desire to get it on all the time. It’s great when they’re in the mood too, but as a horny woman, I know first-hand how much distrust it can cause in a relationship. Our partners always worry that because we love sex so much, we must be going out and getting it with other people as well to satiate the need. That’s obviously not true — liking sex doesn’t mean we’re not loyal, loving, and monogamous partners.

We end up having a lot of mediocre sex. This is probably the worst part of being a horny woman. Because we love sex so much, we try to have as much of it as possible, and a lot of it ends up being mediocre at best and downright terrible at worst. It’d be nice to think that every experience we have is pleasurable, but that’s definitely not the case. We’ve probably had more bad sex than anyone we know, which is a real shame.

Even our friends can’t relate. At a certain point, our love of getting laid far outweighs that of our friends and they end up staring at us like we’re aliens whenever we talk about our escapades. It’s like they just don’t get how we could want to do it pretty much every day, sometimes several times a day. It’s really frustrating and we often end up feeling guilty about our identity as a horny woman even though we know we shouldn’t.

If you’re a horny woman, here are some gentle reminders

There’s nothing wrong with you. This is something that needs to be drummed into your brain over and over again until you truly believe it. There’s nothing abnormal about a woman who enjoys sex just as much as a man does. There’s nothing inherently devious or salacious or any other negative adjective people like to attach to women like us. You’re amazing just as you are.

Sex should be fun! While we would never judge anyone who chooses to wait to have sex or even chooses not to have it at all, there’s nothing wrong with living our best lives and having fun with sex. It can be intense and deeply emotional for many, sure, but it can also be lighthearted and really enjoyable. If that’s your attitude towards intimacy in this way, more power to you!

You’re better than mediocre sex. As mentioned above, a horny woman inevitably has a lot of mediocre or even awful sex. We’re better than that! Don’t settle for someone you know is a bad lay just because you want to indulge your high sex drive. You could go home and use your vibrator and actually get off.

Anyone who judges you isn’t worth your time. There will be people out there who judge us for our sex lives, of course, and isn’t that really sad for them? Their worldview is obviously so provincial and outdated that they don’t realize that women can enjoy their sexuality too and it’s not harming anyone. Sucks to be them.

Your sexuality doesn’t determine your worth. How much you love or don’t love sex and how much you have of it or don’t have really don’t matter. They don’t determine your worth, nor do they mean anything when it comes to the type of person you are. As long as you’re kind to everyone and don’t set out to hurt anyone, you’re doing just fine.

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