You’re ready to take your relationship to the next level, but your man seems happily stuck. You could just tell him you’re ready to get engaged, but that might just scare the hell out of him. Sometimes it’s like dealing with a deer. If you move too fast, the deer runs away. A little patience and subtlety has the deer eating out of your hand.
If your man is ready to propose, trying some subtle hints is more than enough to get him to make a move. Don’t worry if he doesn’t get down on one knee after a day. It’ll take a little time, but you can get your man to propose. Do it right and you’ll be the next one on Facebook with your engagement ring selfie.
- Leave your Pinterest board on the screen. Every man knows his girlfriend has a wedding Pinterest board. Knowing it and seeing it are two different things. When you know he’ll be looking, leave your board up on the screen and walk away to do something else. He’ll get curious and realize you’re ready for a ring.
- Talk about how lucky your friend is to be engaged. I guarantee you have at least one friend who recently got engaged. Who doesn’t? Honestly, I’m pretty sure Facebook is nothing but engagement rings, wedding photos and baby photos. Gush about how lucky your friend is to take that next step. He’ll get the hint.
- Casually check out engagement rings. Women love sparkly things. The next time you’re out together, walk by a jewelry store and point out a few rings. Don’t mention the word “engagement” or “marriage.” Of course, if you can compare a ring to a celebrity’s ring, go for it. It’s more subtle if he thinks you’re just excited to see your favorite celebrity’s ring in a local store.
- Talk about what you loved in a recent wedding you went to. Get him talking about the dress, the reception, the music and pretty much anything else about the a wedding you both went to. Mention how you think you’d do something different if it were you and his wedding.
- Get your friends to talk to him. Telling him upfront that you’re ready for marriage might seem like the easiest approach, but it’s awkward as hell. Get one of your friends to bring up engagement with him to see how he reacts. He knows if your friend is talking about it, you’re probably ready for him to slide a ring on your finger.
- Mention how much you like or don’t like someone else’s ring. Whether it’s a friend or celebrity, talk about their engagement ring. He fully expects you to talk about things like this. Tell him how you love the setting, but don’t like the band. Talk about the shape of the stone or even the size. Hearing what you like helps him know what kind of ring to get. Sometimes finding the right ring is the only thing holding him back.
- Talk about marriage more often. I’m not saying you should talk marriage 24/7. Bringing up celebrity gossip or your friend’s wedding plans does help. The idea is to get him thinking about marriage himself. Think of it like trying to get that one toy at Christmas. The more you talked about it, the more likely your parents were to get the hint.
- Enlist his friends. If you’re friends with his friends, get them to help. He’ll be more likely to act if one of his close friends asks why he hasn’t proposed yet. It’s even better if you can work with one of his married friends. He’ll feel more comfortable hearing advice from someone who’s already taken the plunge.
- Take a new step in your relationship. If there’s any way possible, try taking a new step in your relationship. If you don’t live together, suggest getting a place or staying over so many nights a week. Take longer trips together or just spend more time together in general. He’ll see you’re serious about staying together which helps reduce his fear of rejection.
- Compare yourself to a married couple. Get hypothetical on him. Talk about a married couple you both know and ask how he thinks the two of you would handle certain situations. It’ll get him thinking about the two of you married. That’s always a good thing.
- Go out with engaged or married friends more often. Sometimes men don’t want to propose because they think it just leads to no more fun together. Going out with engaged or married friends shows him this next step doesn’t have to change anything.
- Reference the future. Don’t take this as an opportunity to give him any ultimatums. Trust me, it won’t go well. Instead, just casually talk about the future with things like “maybe when we retire we could travel the world” or “imagine how it’s going to be when we’re dealing with kids.” When he starts thinking about the future, he’ll definitely start thinking about marriage.
- Do more together. Men are terrified you’ll reject them. They’re also afraid you might just lose interest in him. Show him you’re in this for the long haul. Start doing more things together. Start exploring each other’s interests or try out new things together. The more you do together, the more he’ll see you as wife material.
I wish I could say these are guaranteed to work, but if a guy really doesn’t want to get married, he’ll still avoid buying a ring. Give these a try and if he doesn’t make a move within six months or so, he’s probably not ready. Then it’s time to just ask him how he feels.