15 Superficial Things That Stop Mattering When You Meet Your Person

It’s true—the little details that bug everyone when dating often only matter because you’re actually with the wrong person. Your dissatisfaction with minor details is a reflection of a larger and overarching unhappiness. Once you find the right fit, you’ll see that these tiny annoyances don’t matter.

  1. How tall or short they are It’s incredibly dumb, but yes, height matters a lot to some. There are many women out there who only want to date statuesque dudes. There are guys who feel uncomfortable dating women who are taller than they are. If you get past those picky standards and give someone a chance, you’ll realize that height is the least of your worries. Suddenly it just isn’t an issue.
  2. Body type It’s also quite common for people to judge who they date based on what someone’s physical form looks like, but if you expand your mind and pay attention to those you might normally discount, you’ll have better luck finding love. Once you click with someone, those slight “flaws” you once eschewed mean nothing.
  3. Hair—or lack thereof This applies to the hair on someone’s head, body hair, whatever. Many people think they are attracted to certain features on a person only to end up with the exact opposite. It just isn’t important, especially when everything else about someone lines up with what you want.
  4. Vocal patterns Maybe you’ve always been irritated by a certain type of accent. Maybe you can’t stand when someone’s voice has a certain timbre. Go figure—when you fall in love with a person who understands you just the way you are, none of that matters at all.
  5. Odd little quirks There are people in everyone’s lives that just get on your nerves for whatever reason. They might be perfectly nice humans and you probably feel bad that their unique traits bug you. When you find the right match romantically, you won’t even notice the weirdness (or at worst, you’ll adore and embrace it).
  6. Funny habits Everyone has them, but when you find the person who fits you, they won’t bother you in the least. Conversely, yours won’t bother them. There’s so much compatibility between you, so why would you worry about silly stuff?
  7. Past mistakes Everyone makes mistakes and screws up. It’s tough to date someone new and feel like you’re judged for your past. One of the biggest differences you’ll find when you’re with the right person is that you both accept each other exactly as you are—and that includes anything that happened before you met.
  8. Differing opinions Most of the time, when you’re dating someone who isn’t a good match, a difference in feelings on certain subjects ends up breaking the bond beyond repair. Yes, there are certain non-negotiables, but generally none of that stuff matters as much with the right partner.
  9. Social status Sadly, this still matters far too much to far too many people. In the end, it doesn’t matter how many friends someone has or who they are—obviously you don’t want to date a sociopath, but most of the time social life doesn’t reflect what’s inside someone’s soul.
  10. Financial standing Again, this does matter in the extreme—you don’t want to support a freeloader—but then again, you should know better than to date someone who would do that to you. If you’re with the right person, the amount of money they have doesn’t matter. It’s their ambition, drive, and vision that counts.
  11. Flattery So often relationships are built on how you make each other feel, especially in the beginning. It’s inherently superficial until you get to know someone more deeply. When you’re with an amazing partner, you know their words are genuine because you can see through to the authentic human underneath.
  12. Challenging relatives It can be rough dealing with your partner’s family, especially when there are other strains on the relationship. It won’t necessarily be easy to handle stressful relatives when you’re with the right person, but the difference is that you’re absolutely willing to work with the situation because you’re so in love.
  13. Life history The two of you might indeed be quite different and you may have drastically opposite backgrounds. If you’re in sync in a major way, then that doesn’t matter. While what’s past informs you as to how someone has developed, what matters is how they behave in the present.
  14. Academic smarts A person’s school performance really has no bearing on how intelligent they are. If you’re worried about that stuff, you might have other underlying worries. Degrees and titles matter less and less in today’s world—you need ingenuity and work ethic to get by. When you’re with the right partner, the last thing that you’ll care about is their GPA.
  15. What they do for a living It’s so important to so many people, and it’s the most superficial thing ever. Again, it makes sense not to want a deadbeat. On the other hand, often someone’s job title means absolutely nothing about who that person is, and you won’t care how high they rank when you’re with your true match.
A former actress who has always loved the art of the written word, Amy is excited to be here sharing her stories! She just completed her first novel, and is also a contributor for Elite Daily, Dirty & Thirty, and Thought Catalog. Amy is the founder of What If Journey and can be found on Twitter @amyhorton18. You can also visit her website at amyhorton.net.