It Takes More Than Time To Heal A Broken Heart

It Takes More Than Time To Heal A Broken Heart ©iStock/MonkeyBusinessImages

Getting over a breakup is hard, and the idea that “time heals all wounds” is fine and well, but it doesn’t help you when you feel like your heart is literally breaking. Luckily, there are a few other things that can help you get over your ex sooner rather than later and save you from getting caught in a cycle of misery for years to come. If you ever find yourself dumped and devastated, these 10 things will come to your aid when “time” is taking too long to heal your broken heart.

  1. Support from your friends Rebound sex isn’t the only way to get over your ex — you can head to your friends for support instead. Going out to the mall with them can be just as therapeutic as sex with a stranger could ever be.
  2. Enough willpower to avoid temptation You can’t text him when you’re drunk. You can’t look through his Instagram photos when you’re upset. If you let yourself break, then you’re going to go right back to square one. You have to have enough willpower to keep your distance from him.
  3. Intense orgasms You’re capable of fulfilling your needs all on your own. You don’t need a man in order to make your body feel amazing. Realizing that your own two hands (or a little dildo) can make you feel just as special as your ex did will put things into perspective.
  4. Laughter We’ve all heard that “laughter is the best medicine.” That’s why you should visit a comedy club or watch YouTube videos of Louis CK so that you’ll laugh until your sides hurt. It’s better than having your heart hurt.
  5. A garbage can You don’t have to set all of your ex’s clothes on fire. Just return them to him and throw out all of your photographs of him. If you really want to, you can keep them in a box to look back at when you’re old and grey, but don’t let yourself look at them any sooner than that.
  6. An outlet for your anger Take a kickboxing class. Call up your bestie and pretend you’re cursing out your ex. Do whatever you can to expel your negative energy. You need to get it out of your system in order to heal.

Things you need in addition to time to heal a broken heart

  1. A new haircut Yes, it’s cliché, but don’t knock it until you try it. If you don’t want to style your hair differently, then at least buy a new outfit or start exercising to get that six-pack you’ve always wanted. Do whatever you can to switch up your look. When you look different, you’ll feel different.
  2. The ability to forgive yourself Chances are, there were things you did wrong in the relationship. Hell, maybe it ended largely because of your own actions. In that case, the time you’ll need to heal your broken heart will likely be greater, as is the level of grace and mercy you extend to yourself. You’re a human being and you’re not perfect. That’s okay. Be willing to forgive yourself, v0w to do better, and move on.
  3. Some alone time You don’t want to hang out with your friends constantly. You should set aside a few hours of “me time” every week. That way, you can work on loving yourself and forgiving yourself for whatever went wrong in your last relationship. The sooner you can put those things in the past, the faster your heart will heal.
  4. Physical distance from him If you see him at work every single day, it’s going to be hard to get over him. You can’t quit your job just because of a breakup, but you can stop visiting the bars you know he goes to. The less you see of him, the better.
  5. Hope During your darkest days, you’ll feel better if you have hope that you’re eventually going to get over him. You should also have hope that there are other men out there that would never hurt you the way that your ex has.
  6. The desire for more and better  Your relationship ended for a reason. Even if you don’t understand or agree with that reason, things didn’t work out because they weren’t meant to. In order to move on, you’ll need to have a desire for a healthier, more loving, more vibrant, more peaceful relationship next time around. That desire will help inform your boundaries and get you excited for what’s still to come.
  7. A little perspective At the end of the day, breakups happen. They might feel like the end of the world in the immediate aftermath. You may vow to never love again and insist you’ll never be able to move on, but you know deep down that’s not the case. Give it a healthy dose of time and all of the things listed above and you’ll be well on your way.
Holly Riordan is a writer from Long Island, New York who has authored several science fiction and horror books. A graduate of Stony Brook University, she has spent nearly a decade writing for publications including Thought Catalog, Huffington Post, Teen Vogue, and more. You can find her on Instagram @hollyrio and Twitter @hollyyrio.