If you’re looking for a serious relationship, the last thing you need is a guy who is only interested in dating for sex. The real problem with guys like this is that they’re rarely ever honest or upfront about their intentions. They’d much rather lead you along until they get what they want and then bail. Watching out for these tell-tale signs can you spot a player from a mile away so you can avoid him and not waste your time.
- Netflix and chill is his idea of a date. If he invites you over to his place for the very first date, there’s a good chance he’s a player. He’s probably trying to get you into his bed as quickly as possible and doesn’t want to bother pretending like he wants to go on a real date with you. Some players might take you out for a drink or dinner once or twice, but as soon as you sleep with them, he stops taking you out. All your “dates” start and end in his house or yours. You hang out together a lot but rarely ever in public.
- His actions don’t match his words. He swears that he adores you and cares a great deal about you but he never calls, doesn’t text first, or reply your messages on time. He makes promises and plans, but he never follows through. When you make future plans involving the both of you, you’re never sure that he’s going to show up. He constantly talks about how much he misses you when you’re apart, but the relationship never seems to be moving forward.
- He won’t let you meet his friends. When a guy wants you to be a part of his life, he’ll make an effort to integrate you into his circle. He’ll introduce you to his friends and family. He’ll want to show you off to the people who mean the world to him. The last thing a player wants is for you to get any ideas about your place in his life so he’s going to isolate you from his social circle. If he does let you meet his friends, they’ll show very little interest in you because they know you’re just the fling of the moment.
- He’s not interested in getting to know you. A guy who doesn’t ask you personal questions, let you peek into his mind, or discuss important topics with him isn’t interested in your thoughts or opinions because he doesn’t really want to be with you. He’s only here for a good time and nothing more. If he’s only focused on just having fun, going to parties, watching movies, sex, and other distractions, he’s likely playing you.
- He comes on strong and super smooth. Players are really smooth talkers. They’ve perfected the art of flirting and romance because they’ve had to do it a lot with a ton of women. They know how to make women swoon and fall at their feet. They’re also terribly persistent. Once they set eyes on you, they won’t let you slip away until they’re done with you. They always try to move the relationship forward quickly, not because they want commitment, but because he wants to get naked with you fast.
- The mention of commitment makes him wither. Does the guy you’re seeing avoid any conversations about the relationship? Is he always talking about how he’s not looking for a relationship right now or doesn’t believe in them? Does he disappear when things appear to be getting serious? Maybe he prefers not to label things and uses vague terms to describe what the two of you have. I hate to break it to you, but that man is a player.
- He changes his tone to match your desires. When you first start talking, he might say that he’s not really looking for something serious but just wants to see how it goes. But after a couple of dates and you still don’t put out because you’d like to keep sex off the table until you’re sure the relationship is going somewhere, he’s going to start hinting that he’s also open to a relationship. He’ll make it seem like he wants to become your boyfriend. He’ll say anything you want to hear just to get you into bed.
- He’s inconsistent. One day he treats you like the absolute love of his life, spoils you with attention and gifts, and acts like he’d be lost without you. The next, he stops texting you for some reason, you don’t hear from him for weeks, and he claims to be too busy to hang out. You’re never sure where you stand with him and you’re always trying to figure out what his intentions are or why he keeps running hot and cold.