You really like him and your budding relationship is going great. You almost can’t believe you’ve finally found something and someone stable, reliable, and honest… you think. Sometimes you get a niggling feeling that there’s something he might not be telling you. If you’re not 100 percent sure he’s being honest with you, here’s how you tell.
- He makes eye contact. A person’s willingness to make eye contact with you when you meet them is a really reliable gauge for measuring honesty. The guys I’ve dated in the past who failed the eye contact test and averted their gaze ended up being total losers. The winners, well, let’s just say I married one of them.
- He doesn’t hide his phone. I’m not saying you should be a snoop—boundaries are a good thing and you should have them—but if your boyfriend leaves his phone in plain view, that’s a good sign that he has nothing to hide. If it’s always flipped screen-side down, hidden in his back pocket, or overly protected, watch out.
- He doesn’t try to get one over on people. I once knew a guy that had a “trick” for skipping out on leaving tips at restaurants and was proud of it. Needless to say, I wasn’t impressed. If your guy thinks it’s clever to cheat people in one way, he may very well cheat you in another.
- He didn’t cheat on past girlfriends. You know what they say—once a cheater, always a cheater. Although I don’t totally agree with this statement, it does tend to be true rather often. While it may be best not to date cheaters in the first place, you can still have a successful relationship with someone who was unfaithful in the past. So, has your boyfriend ever cheated? If he has, you should get some more details. How does he feel about the situation now? Does he blame her? Make sure who he is now is different than who he was then.
- He calls out of work when he’s actually sick. Okay, we’ve all called out of work when we weren’t exactly sick and spent the day doing something fun instead, but this should be the exception and not the rule. Is your boyfriend constantly calling out and faking an illness? You may think this is an unrelated sign but it actually shows a lack of personal integrity.
- His friends think he’s honest. So maybe his pals don’t refer to him as Honest Abe, but have they ever mentioned anything about him being a liar? Friends are ones to rib each other for doing stupid things, so pay attention if any stories have to deal with less than truthful decisions on his part.
- His parents are proud of him. This is something that is generally easy to tell but be cautious. A parent’s opinion isn’t always a truthful one. Regardless, listen to what his mom and dad say and you might just be able to decipher his character. If they think he is dishonest, it’ll be apparent.
- He communicates with you without prodding. Dishonest people are generally poor communicators. If you and your guy can talk about virtually everything, this is a really great sign that’s he’s an honest guy. If he puts up walls and changes certain topics, it may not mean he has something to hide but it could very well be an indicator of dishonesty.
- He treats you the same in public as he does in private. It’s a bad sign if a guy is all about you in public and then couldn’t care less about you behind the scenes. Dishonest guys tend to make a show, a grand display, of who they’re seeing—but they’re often seeing a lot of women at the same time. If your guy does this, you really ought to cut him out of your life. On the other hand, if your guy is loving both in public and in private, he’s a keeper.
- He’s not an egomaniac. Humility is everything. What dishonest guys tend to lack in the humility department they make up for in charm and good looks. If you’re dating a guy with a huge ego, there’s a good chance he’s dishonest and this could certainly spell disaster.
- You don’t spot any obvious red flags. This last point is a big one because it’s all about you. One of the best ways to know if your guy is honest is to consider him objectively. Has there ever been anything that gave you cause for concern? Have you just gotten the feeling that he’s cheating on you but you can’t exactly prove it? If you don’t spot any red flags at the moment, make sure to revisit his character from time to time. Remember to always trust your intuition, ladies!